Friday, 2 August 2013

There are some Tossers about

At present the Engagement is in a phase of back-to-back telephone calls each and every day. The calls are to establish requirements and hopefully the client will actually decide not only what they want but also when they want it too.

"Now," I hear you ask "why would one be interested in attending these calls?" Initially I had the same thoughts; Why would I want and sit with a phone glued to my ear listening to material that had no real importance to me? Especially after the delightful prospect of Garden Leave lay shattered like a crystal glass impacting on a cold stone floor. These are all very good and valid points but the way I see it is as follows ...

... If I MUST continue to work on this deal then spending all day on a conference call is the least worst option. All I do is dial in, announce my name and say absolutely nothing for the remainder of the call. I leave the windbags at Dante's to fill each sixty minute slot with noise that I pay no heed.This leaves me time to have Instant Messenger conversations with friends and colleagues and explore and progress the activities I need to complete as part of my exit plan.*

After all, if I have spent seven hours of the day on a series of conference calls it would be churlish in the extreme to expect a significant output of work products in the same time frame.**

So that is how I propose to fill the remaining fourteen working days at Dante's. Actually this number has now been reduced to twelve and one half working days as my complete and utter bell-end of a manger has finally deigned to respond to my Exit Plan e-mail and it is fair to say that a couple of his responses have annoyed me somewhat but he did grudgingly confirm that my leave had been pro rated and that I had an extra day and a half to book.

First I had better explain that, after giving notice on Monday, I was advised that he needed forty eight hours to get things in motion. I felt that this period expired around midday on Wednesday and so was somewhat disappointed to hear nothing at all. After all, I am only going to resign from Dante's once while he, as a manager, should be expected to experience it on a number of occasions. *** I didn't know what processes should be taking place and was looking to him for guidance. Actually a formal acknowledgement of my resignation would have been polite and professional too.

In this information vacuum I started to work my way through my perceived set of exit actions and fired off a few e-mails to my manager with pertinent questions. All I got back was a holding reply which told me nothing. I then picked up on a conference call**** an utterance that suggested that my manager was off work next week. I therefore sent him an e-mail asking for a formal response to my questions and nomination of a managerial deputy during his absence.

In response I got a snotty email that carried the absolute bare minimum of information and there was one answers that infuriated me ...

... I asked if I would be allowed to port my work mobile 'phone number when I left Dante's. I also asked if my 'phone bought by me through a company scheme could be unlocked thereby allowing me a wider choice of service providers after departure. I should say at this point that both of these requests are documented as permissible in the Leaving Dante's Checklist.

I was therefore somewhat taken aback when he replied advising that in the circumstances he was not prepared to authorise. Now I can grudgingly accept that he might decline porting my 'phone number as there could be a conflict of interest due to the relationship between Dante's Nine Circles of Hell and The Neat & Tidy Piano Movers but I can see absolutely no reason for him not authorising the unlocking of my handset. The phone is my personal property and is restricted to a particular Service Provider because it was bought through a company scheme. There is no conflict of interest in allowing me a wider choice of mobile 'phone services in the future.

Basically he is either taking a dog in a manger attitude or just doesn't have the intellect to have understood what I am actually asking for.

Still, as they say, there are several ways to skin a cat and I am now in possession of the IMEI number that will allow me to choose any provider I like.

It is annoying about the number porting though.
* There is probably a goodly chunk of cyberloafing too. That is a lovely turn of phrase
** Pot calling the Kettle Black? ... possibly
*** actually, the way things are looking, he could be doing it a lot more in the next few months
**** amazing that I was actually listening!

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