Short of material?

I tend to start my day in a leisurely fashion with a cup of coffee whilst I catch up on the news headlines.

I was about to say "my media outlet of choice is BBC Breakfast", but I think I'll rapidly correct myself and, instead, and describe it as "one of the least worst options for the morning news bulletin".

Once you've absorbed the BBC's choice of morning headlines you are left watching a series of quite bizarre journalistic articles punctuated with mundane vox pops all of which repeat on a 30 minute cycle.

It must be stated that there is far, far more going on in the world than could ever be ascertained from BBC Breakfast.*

Anyway ... to the point of today's rant ... Obviously the majority of the main news items are related to the Coronavirus pandemic.

However, it appears that the BBC have now abandoned any effort to collate and present real news stories, as this morning it seems that the Editors have given up and just let Dan Walker and Louise Minchin prattle on about interesting shit that they had seen on Facebook the previous evening.

Give me strength!

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* The one thing I can say for this TV show is that it does increase my heart rate as I am usually in full on rant mode after watching about ten minutes of their bumph.

The makings of a fine bacon sandwich?

It was yet another quiet day at "the coal face", although a reasonably straightforward request for support did arrive.  I leapt on it like a ravenous wolf, before any of my equally short of work colleagues could dash in and take this morsel scrap.

Twenty minutes of admin were necessary to log the work and arrange the necessary calls before I was, once again, left with very little to do.

30% headed out for essential groceries leaving me to occupy myself ...

It is day #2 of the sour dough starter preparation and a few minutes were spent whisking 120g of strong, white flour in to the milk and yoghurt mixture. It has now been covered and will be left at room temperature for two days. By Wednesday I should be able to see lots of small bubbles and it should smell "pleasantly sour".

30% returned from her mission and reported that the local Farm Shop was very quiet, as was the Butcher's. She had had a successful trip and presented me with a large loin of pork ...

Previously we had discussed making some more bacon and a quick rummage through the store cupboard had uncovered a pound, or so, of cure* all mixed up and ready to go.

I am now using a curing method given to me by a local pig farmer; Mick The Pig. The method involves massaging the loin with a few handfuls of cure, ensuring that all surfaces have been well rubbed. The loin is then placed in a vacuum bag** and a couple of handfuls of cure are spread on the upper and lower surfaces of the meat. The meat is then sealed and left in the bottom of the fridge for six days. It needs to be turned over once a day.

At the end of this process the bacon will be removed from the bag and washed and dried. It will then be wrapped in muslin and hung up for a few days before smoking.***

More on the bread and bacon, over the next few days.

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* A 50:50 mixture of salt and brown sugar mixed with ground aromatics; Bay leaves, Coriander seed, Black Pepper, Star Anise and Smoked Chipotle Chilli flakes
** Apparently a Ziplock bag can be used as an alternative.
*** I thought you ate bacon ... groan !

The staff of life

Self isolation/social distancing has resulted in a very quiet weekend and there was no way that I could make tidying the office and walking the dogs interesting.

Despite being at home most of the time, the very fact that I am not allowed out, except for exercise and essential journeys, does have an impact and there were points over the weekend when I did start to feel somewhat constrained.

The weather has changed significantly and the warmth earlier in the week as been replaced by a bitter blow from the North. As a result there was no way that pottering in the garage or messing with the bikes was an option.*

I needed something to pique my interest and a recent impact of panic buying may have provided the solution.

We have used a bread maker for most of the bread we eat for the past 15 years. Our cupboards normally have plenty of flour and yeast, but our pot of yeast is running low. At the moment the shops have none in stock as the panic buying fuckwits have obviously bought every pot they can lay their hands on.

At this point I should advise that we are not in dire straits, nor are we at risk of starvation. The local shops have plenty of bread and BBQ Dave has given us a tub of yeast that will last us a few weeks.

However, this shortage got us thinking and we decided that making a sour dough loaf might be an interesting diversion and possibly be the way forward if the current movement restrictions remain in place for any length of time.

Obviously our bread maker is of no use at all for making a sour dough loaf,** so it looks like I will be making bread "hands on" for the first time in many, many years.

I thought back to the last time I made bread by hand and it was probably back in 1983 when I was a student living in a grimy, damp, shared house in Park Lane, Wolverhampton.  For some reason I got it in to my head that making bread would be more economical than buying it and I started to make my own wholemeal loaves using the most basic of baking equipment.

Despite the cold house, the lack of experience and a complete absence of loaf tins, I produced some fabulous bread that was appreciated by my housemates.

Anyway, back to the present, I dug out a sour dough recipe and it is fair to say that it didn't occupy that much of my weekend...

Step one was to warm 175ml of skimmed milk, add 75 ml of live yogurt, stir, cover and put in a warm place for 24 hours.

It will take about 5 days for the starter to be ready to use, so next Saturday could be a busy day.

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* I hate being cold. I love cold frosty and snowy weather and am happy to be out in it wrapped up in the finest warm weather clothing, but I loathe trying to complete a task and be distracted by that whole body discomfort of feeling cold.
** There are bread maker recipes for sour dough loaves, but they all include measures of dried yeast, which, to me, seems to be somewhat contradictory.

Toast

After our rescue mission on Monday, TP is now enduring a period of self isolation to minimise the risk of infecting me or 30% with the Covid19 virus.

He's not showing any symptoms, but he has been out and about for the past couple of weeks, so this is just a precautionary measure.

His confinement is far from arduous as he has a spacious bedroom and his own bathroom and he is able to get outside for fresh air and exercise.  Meals and snacks are ordered via WhatsApp and are delivered on a tray and left outside his bedroom door.

Fundamentally, it is like he's in a hotel where room service is the only option for food and beverages.

As TP is totally dependent on us for nourishment I decided that his meals should be assembled with, shall we say, a creative flourish.

His preferred breakfast is a mug of black coffee and a slice of toast with peanut butter. Rather than simply cut the toast in to approximate halves along the centre line, I decided to mix things up a bit.

On Tuesday his breakfast slice had been cut in a "V" and Wednesdays was a rather random sort of zig-zag.

Today I may have peaked as I presented him with a slice of toast cut in to 32 roughly equal pieces about 2cm squared ... he wasn't amused.

Tomorrow I'm thinking about combining toast, peanut butter and coffee in a delicious breakfast smoothie.

Messing around with a few numbers

Thursday was slightly busier than Wednesday and I spent the morning trying to get to grips with a rather complicated cost model that a frolleague had developed back in 2019 for a piece of new business.

Apparently there is a problem with the specification of some servers and the ones that are being installed need to be removed and repurposed while new hardware is brought in to replace them. I've offered to help "Tel" out by updating his model as, and when, the costs arrived.

After some initial head scratching I soon developed a basic understanding of how the numbers were presented and collated and started to record the new data.  It then became clear that the quote was not as straightforward as initially thought and we are not clear on whether the price, the quantity or both are being increased.*

I now need to sit and wait while we get the Supplier to be a little more precise on the costs and how they are changing.

As a result I had a fairly slow afternoon and enjoyed another walk with the dogs in the glorious sunshine. The local lanes have finally dried out and I no longer need to restrain the dogs to prevent them getting filthy.*** They had a wild time bouncing off each other as they charged about, begrudgingly coming back when I called them in as we encountered other walkers.

And that is just about it for today.

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* The quote identifies the affected line items and advises the amount that each will increase. It details both price and quantity, but doesn't advise whether "p", "q" or both are increasing. The price appears to be the same as the preceding quote, but it is possible that they are just doubling their price!**
** This is network hardware after all!
*** I enjoy a walk, but am not so keen on spending twenty minutes hosing down and drying two reluctant Standard Poodles afterwards. This does happen frequently over the wetter months, but I do try to minimise post-perambulation canine ablutions as much as poss.

Nothing to see here

It is fair to say that work is very quiet at the moment and the two requests I picked up last week were quickly resolved, with no real need for me to get involved.

A frolleague; "Tel" is in need of some assistance and we had a quick chat about it this morning, but there is nothing much to do until some fresh costs come in later in the week.

As a result I had a very quiet day and the only thing of any significance was a walk around the Three Miler in glorious sunshine with TP and the dogs.

The lack of events, occurrences or situations have resulted in me trawling my photo archives and presenting a picture post.

Cocoa Pods - Arenal, Costa Rica

I do like an unusual botanical subject and this one was taken in 2018 when 30% and I were touring Costa Rica. These are cocoa pods and were surprisingly large, being eight to ten inches in length and tightly packed with the cocoa beans.

As I mentioned last Tuesday, our holiday in Costa Rica will always be tainted by the loss of Tyson while we were away.  We did have a lovely time and some amazing experiences, including seeing Olive Ridley Turtles hauling themselves on to shore to lay in the starlight.

But, as I said, it will always be a great holiday that we wish we'd never taken.

A Blast from the past

30% headed in to work early this morning, as she wanted to get ahead with a new service that is likely to be needed without delay.

As she left she pointed to a thawing pack of stewing beef and "suggested" that I might like to use it as a basis for tonight's dinner.

Now, many years ago I used to cook a mean beef stew, but that was a long time back and the details of the recipe were a little hazy. I wandered over to the cupboard that houses the cook books, but could find no sign of the little pamphlet that documented this culinary treasure.

I was left with no option and simply had to wing it. This is what I did ...

Beef Stew

1kg Stewing Beef (cubed)
3 medium onions (chopped)
4 carrots (sliced)
2 heaped dessert spoons of flour
Salt and black pepper
1 pint of Chicken stock
3-4 tsp Worcester Sauce
3 or 4 Bay Leaves
3-4 tsp Dried Thyme
2 handfuls of Pearl Barley

1.  Coat the beef in the seasoned flour and brown in a frying pan
2.  Once browned, remove the beef and set to one side
3.  Add the carrots and onions to the frying pan, adding more oil if necessary
4.  Saute the carrots and onions for 5 - 10 minutes until they start to soften
5.  Add the stock, Worcester Sauce, Bay Leaves and Thyme to the pan and bring to the boil
6.  Add the beef to the simmering pan of carrots and onions
7.  Add the contents of the pan to a slow cooker and cook on low setting for 6 hours. Add a little extra stock or water if the gravy needs thinning
8.  a couple of handfuls of pearl barley can be added two hours before the stew is to be served, if desired

At seven thirty dinner was served and, what can I say ... "I've still got it".

Dunkirk

Let me set the scene ...

TP holed up in deepest, darkest Cardiff.  Cases of Covid19 on the increase. An announcement of movement restrictions expected imminently.

As I am sure you can imagine, 30% was in full on "mum mode" and resources were to be mobilised immediately for a recovery mission.

Putting crappy jokes aside for a moment, TP's lease expires in the very near future and his workload has completely dried up.  Based on current Government advise it would be virtually impossible for him to locate another room to rent, let alone move himself or pay for it for that matter.

Early in the afternoon 30% and I headed down to Cardiff in the Defender and her Mini.

TP was well prepared and most of his belongings were already packed and piled in the hallway ready for loading.  It took an hour, or so, for us to cram our vehicles to the proverbial gills. We managed virtually all of his stuff with the exception of his home brewing vessels and an aged Sony flat screen TV.

We were back on the road before three o'clock and we were all back home safely by five.  TP actually seeing Army vehicles heading in to Cardiff as he left!

TP is now self-isolating for the next week and both 30% and I are relieved to have him back at home.

Our timing was perfect, as later that evening Boris Johnson announced the initial set of movement restrictions.

Weekend Round-up

 Saturday
Social Distancing/Isolation is now the new normal and, to be honest, it hasn't made a huge difference to 30% and me.

I have been a home worker for fifteen years and am used to, and actually enjoy, the isolation, using the 'phone, instant messaging and e-mail for work and social contact. 30% is much the same and fortunately we actually enjoy being at home together.

I am not so naive to not be aware that that several weeks, or even months, of social distancing will be tough to bear, but at least we both have some experience of living this way and it is not such a complete culture shock as it will be for those that head out to a place of work every day.

We spent the morning cooking up a batch of Bolognese and other culinary activities. I then nipped out to fill the Defender with diesel as the price has plummeted over the past few weeks.

Lunch followed and then we headed out around the 3 miler with the dogs and this is where we saw the impact of SD.   The lanes around the village are just like they are at Christmas with walkers I have never seen before.  People are clearly feeling the need to get out of the house now they are unable to escape to their places of work.*

A kip on the sofa followed the walk** and I then released the porn mower and trimmed the lawn.

The evening began with a G&T followed by a steak dinner and a night in front of the television ... trying to ignore it and read tablets, magazines and other alternative forms of entertainment instead.

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* We are bumping in to dogs that we have never seen being walked before. They are easy to spot as they are all on leads and have quite a surprised expression on their faces.
** This is the law.

Sunday
A quick breakfast was consumed before I returned to the kitchen, knocked up a batch of pea and ham soup and tidied up the aftermath.

30% had headed out to the supermarket to take advantage of her NHS staff card in the hope of picking up a few store cupboard essentials that we are running short of.

And that just about takes care of Sunday morning.

In the afternoon we eventually headed out around the Three miler. I say eventually as 30% had to pop over to the local surgery where key staff are working at the weekend to prepare for the next set of Covid19 initiatives. It appears that she has a new role involving the set up and support of the new services that will be needed as self-isolation of vulnerable patients takes effect.

We eventually hit the lanes with the dogs and it was rammed with families out escaping the confines of their homes. Yesterday I said that it was like Christmas, but I was definitely under calling the number of people out on a walk.* I think there are two or three times the volume of Christmas walkers.

Several hours** later we made it home and settled in for the afternoon. I cleaned my shotgun as it looks like it is going to be months before any of the local shooting grounds re-open ... unless, of course, this really is the dawn of the Zombie apocalypse?

It looks like we will be heading down to Cardiff in the next couple of days to collect TP and his belongings. His lease expires in the next couple of months and he has little chance of picking up freelance work in the current environment, so has decided that home is the best place to wait this out and then start afresh when it all blows over.

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* Why do their bloody kids feel the need to take a scooter out on a country walk? I wonder whether the thought process is as follows ... " I don't wanna go outside, I don't wanna go for a walk, its boring out there ... I'll take my scooter/skateboard/bike that'll minimise the effort and minimise the time away from the TV/tablet/'phone."
** That's what it felt like after 30% felt obligated to chunter on to each and every one of them.

All is well

Well, at least it is on the beekeeping front.

The weather was reasonably fine today and shortly after lunch I found a spare half an hour to pop down the road to see Kathy H-R.

I dropped off a small parcel of groceries that 30% had picked up for Kathy and then I took a quick look at the hive that sits in her front garden.

It was going to be a quick peek at best since a cool wind was blowing and I didn't want to chill the colony nor any brood that might be developing. I got the smoker lit and gave a few puffs at the hive entrance. I could see worker bees taking in pollen, which is usually a sign that the queen is laying and that there are larvae to be fed. So far, so good ...

I lifted off the hive roof, noting that the colony had eaten most of the 2.5 kilos of candy* that had been provided as emergency winter feed. This was another positive sign.

I lifted the hive crown board a centimetre or two and gave the colony another couple of puffs of smoke. The crown board was then lifted and I was rewarded with a marvellous sight. The colony covered eight or nine of the brood frames, which is a good size at this point in the year.

I inspected a few of the frames in the centre of the cluster of bees** and saw a healthy patch of capped brood. That was all I wanted to see and I quickly closed up the hive, hopefully without chilling it too much.

All six of my hives have made it through the winter.  I just hope that we get a mild dry Spring with plenty of blossom and flowers ...

... I've already been asked about whether I can supply some mini jars of honey for wedding favours.

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* A soft sugar paste, very similar to fondant icing.
** This is the warmest part of the colony and where the queen and the brood nest are most likely to be found

Yes, no, maybe

I picked up a couple of piece of work yesterday and spent this morning clarifying the requirements and getting them off the starting blocks.

Both appeared to be relatively straightforward opportunities that could be turned around with little effort in short timeframes.

I discussed the first with the Sales Guy, clarified a minor discrepancy and within 40 minutes I had the correct teams engaged to develop the solution and quotes.

The second was somewhat different. For starters the Sales Lead didn't bother turning up to the kick off call and neither did the Project Manager. Our Architect did appear and, in his genial manner, dismissed the Approach being undertaken by the Designers and told them to go and do something much simpler and more appropriate.

After ten minutes it appeared that there was nothing for me to do, other than issue a short call summary and then close out the work request.

However this is now looking a little premature and I may actually need to get my hands dirty.

Every Cloud ...

It doesn't appear to be "all doom and gloom" here in the Covid19 stricken UK.

I learnt today that the BBC has cancelled all Eastenders filming and has halved the weekly episode count from four to two.

30% has put a black armband on, whilst I am beaming from ear to ear.*

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*I would rather watch a blank screen or a video loop of a dog shitting for half an hour than this amateurish tripe.

Gone, but never to be forgotten

Today was the calm "yang" to yesterday's exiting "yin".

The Government's Coronavirus advice has deemed me as an "at risk" member of the population and I must now be largely shielded from social contact for the next 12 weeks. Anyone who knows me well might joke that this is no change from my normal behaviour, but over the past couple of years 30% and I have developed quite a social life.

30% and I do enjoy our own company, but I think we'll be gagging for some socialising by the time this all calms down.

Very little happened today. I provided a modicum of consultation to a colleague and took Marauder around the Three Miler for a breath of fresh air and that is just about it.

Anyone who is familiar with this Journal will know that Marauder is one of our three Standard Poodles and she is nearly 11 years old now. Our other two were Tyson and Whiffler, but we very sadly lost Tyson back in May 2018.

She was a real character and very much my dog, so we were devastated to return from a holiday in Costa Rica to find that she had suffered a twisted gut in the Boarding Kennels and had died during post operative care.

It was months before either 30% or I could really talk about her and, even now, a mention of her name leaves us both with a sad smile and a real sense of loss.

We used to joke that three dogs was "one too many", but after six months we realised that three was the magic number and 30% started to hunt down a new pup that was most definitely not a replacement!

I still remember the first pup we went to look at. The breeder had a 5 year old black bitch that looked very much like Tyson and, as she looked at us, we both realised that we were not ready for another black dog ... the sight of this lovely girl brought back too many painful memories.

In the end we travelled to deepest Kent and brought back this little horror.

In truth she is an absolute delight and is one of the most calm puppies we have had, but she still has the switch that turns her in to a complete and utter maniac from time to time.

I suppose I should give her an alias, but I'll need to think on that for a little while longer.

Freestylin' it

I've been a type 1 diabetic since the age of eight and today, nearly 46 years on, there has been a step change in the monitoring and management of my condition.

The key to management of type 1 diabetes is to maintain a balance between doses of insulin, carbohydrate intake and the amount of exercise taken.  The aim is to maintain one's blood glucose level within safe boundaries and avoid the rather nasty and potentially life limiting side effects of poor diabetic control.*

Knowing your blood glucose level is important and the measurement methods have certainly developed over the years.

When I was first diagnosed in the early 1970s home blood glucose testing was primitive, to say the least.**

Basically a diabetic's urine was tested to see whether it contained any traces of glucose. This wasn't a test of blood glucose, but of urine glucose levels. If your blood glucose control was poor then glucose was passed through your kidneys and out in to your pee.

The test involved putting 5 drops of pee and ten drops of water in to a test tube and adding a reagent tablet. An exothermic reaction occurred and after a lot of fizzing a coloured liquid remained. This was compared with a colour chart to give an estimate of glucose levels. As I said, crude and hardly the most straightforward activity when out and about.

To this day I can still remember that blue and green were good results, orange was most definitely not.

I understand that this reagent kit was eventually replaced by a plastic stick that was simply dipped in your pee, but I don't recall every having that made available for use at home.

If we jump forward to the late 1980's a significant change took place.

I had moved down to London for a new job and signed on at my local hospital's Diabetic Clinic. I was asked about testing and I mentioned the use of Ames urine glucose reagent tablets. The Consultant scoffed that "those were for old ladies" and handed me a cardboard box containing a palm sized meter, a finger pricking device, a tube of test strips and a lengthy instruction manual.

This was a personal blood glucose measuring device. I simply inserted a test strip in to the meter, pricked the end of one finger and squeezed to release a small drop of blood. The drop of blood was then placed on the test strip and within a few seconds my blood glucose level was shown on an LCD display.

I was now able to actually test my blood glucose rather than urine glucose and this could be done relatively discretely whenever and wherever I wanted or needed.

I've been testing my blood several times a day ever since until today ...

This morning I had an appointment with my Diabetes Specialist Nurse and, having attended the prerequisite training, she has authorised me to use the Freestyle Libra monitoring system.

This is a waterproof circular disk that adheres to my arm it has a microfibre sensor that protrudes under my skin, constantly reading my blood glucose levels. The disk has a near field rfid chip and passes data to an app on my phone whenever I pass my phone over the disk. The disk stays in place for 14 days before it needs to be replaced.

I've only had the Libra disk a few hours and it is a revelation. At a glance I can now not only see my blood glucose level, but also whether it is steady or trending up or down.

Only time will tell how I get on with this new technology and the most important aspect is whether my overall control improves. We shall see.

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* You really don't want to know, but if you insist ... loss of sight, impotence, kidney failure, loss of sensation in extremities which can lead to gangrene, amputations and often death.
** Hospitals could test blood glucose, but the test involved a blood sample being taken and then taken up to the Labs for processing. This was usually done a couple of times a year at one's Diabetic review with a Consultant.

Weekend Round Up

Well, Clive Anderson on Friday was pretty much as expected.

It was an anecdotal/autobiographical monologue delivered in his normal bumbling style. Parts of it were reasonably witty and interesting, but overall it fell well short of the mark and 30% and I left before the end of the second half.

I think the main problem was that he repeatedly described himself as a stand-up comedian and, if he is, he isn't a very good one.

If I'd spent the evening in the pub with Clive listening to the same material I would have come home and said I had had a brilliant night out. This thing is money had been paid for a professional performance from a self proclaimed stand-up comedian and that isn't what I got.

Anyway, the tickets were free and our early departure meant we avoided car park chaos, so the evening could have been much worse.

Overall: 4/10 - must try harder!

Saturday
For the past week BBQ Dave and I had been keeping a close eye on the weather.

We had been planning a trip up to Hailes Shooting Ground for a morning of clay pigeon shooting with Bubbles and Grubby Mark and we had been praying to the Gods for fair weather.

We were blessed and had a great morning shooting and, in my case frequently missing, some quite challenging targets.

The afternoon saw a trip in to Alcester to drop off an order of honey at the Jewellers*. We picked up a few supplies and noticed a possible symtom of the Coronavirus outbreak. The car parks were quieter than one would have expected and the Supermarket shelves had some significant gaps. 30% got chatting to the manager at Waitrose and he told us that an order of toilet paper that would normally last 4 days had been sold in 24 hours and that they were currently experiencing a Christmas like sales experience with none of the staffing or preparations that are put in place to run a Supermarket chain over a period of intense demand.

The evening saw us with a house full. 30% had invited Grubby Sue and Mark along with Sheila over for a Chinese takeaway,** a few drinks and a general catch-up.

We were also joined by TP and his "friend"*** for the weekend. TP has embarked on a career as a freelance Sound Engineer after graduating in July last year. Unfortunately his work is being impacted by the virus outbreak and consequent event cancellations, so he used his now free weekend to spend some time with us, or, more truthfully, his girlfriend.

Sunday
I'd been half tempted to head over to Throckmorton this morning for another round of clay shooting, but the weather was miserable and, if I am totally honest, I really fancied a lazy day after a quite hectic start to the year.

We enjoyed a family breakfast, which is a rare occasion nowadays and the remainder of the morning was spent pottering.

In the afternoon 30% and I headed in to Redditch to pick up a few supplies. We definitely weren't panic buying, but, with three Standard Poodles to feed, our trolley full of dog food may have looked like we were!

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* Jewellery and Honey may seem an odd combination of wares, but for some reason my product and packaging seems to be a perfect match with "Vanellope's" decor and beautiful creations.  However, it is rumoured that a lot of the honey ends up being bought by the team rather than customers.
** Our local Chinese is normally very busy with the 'phone ringing constantly on a Saturday evening ... not tonight. There was only one other customer waiting for an order and the 'phone didn't ring at all for the five or ten minutes I was in there.  I wonder if this is yet another reaction to the virus and its origins in China?
*** a lovely girl who designs and builds props at a local theatre.

that "Friday Feeling"

Well here I am at the end of the week and I certainly have that "Friday Feeling".

You know the one I mean. The anticipation of two work free days. The slightly less conscientious view of work matters because it is the end of the week and, irrespective of what I do, or don't do, nothing is really going to happen until Monday at the earliest.

Yes, that "Friday feeling".

The unfortunate thing is that I have had it all week ...

Things have suddenly become very quiet on the Piano Moving front.  For the best part of eighteen months I have been occupied with looking at alternative ways in which we can deliver, contract and charge for a service we provide to our customer.

Now, after numerous iterations and demands for innovative solutions and even more innovative* pricing, the customer has decided that this activity is too disruptive and we have all been stood down.

This is part of a much bigger initiative and only time will tell whether work will pick up, so all I can do is wait and hope something comes in to keep me busy. 

After a week of sitting at my laptop waiting for something to happen I basically abandoned that facade and got on with a few domestic tasks instead.

As a result the kitchen is a whole lot tidier and the lawn is much less scruffy.** I can now see the floor in the bedroom, tomorrow's honey order has been assembled and the dogs have been walked around the Three Miler.

I bumped in to BBQ Dave and his good lady; Janet*** on my walk and we wandered back to their house for a chat and a cup of tea.

Basically I have had a very productive Friday on the home front, leaving me with two work free days to really enjoy.

The weekend proper starts with a trip over to the Artrix theatre in Bromsgrove to see Clive Anderson in Me, MacBeth and I.

Hopefully there will be more on that in the next Journal entry.

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* For this read "ridiculously cheap"
** Surprisingly, this was not the first cut of the year. We had a very mild and dry spell at the beginning of February and the porn mower actually had its first outing of 2020 on 4th February.
*** Now I do like an alias, but Janet is actually her real name, but very few people know that. It's actually the Welsh version of Janet; Sioned, but everyone calls her something quite different.

Stepping on to the Plague Ship

It was another quiet day at work, so I thought a quick forty winks was in order before heading out around the Three Miler with the dogs.

I had just settled down on the sofa when the 'phone rang.  It was 30% and I was somewhat surprised, as she had literally only just left the house for work about five minutes previously.

At this point I probably need to fill in a little of the back story ... actually, I'm not sure why I need to do that. After all, it is highly likely that there is anyone out there reading this a) because I haven't posted anything in the past four years and b) because if there is anyone out there reading this, they are highly unlikely to have read all of the preceding entries and therefore know anything at all about 30%.

30% has been my partner in crime for the best part of 20 years and the last time I was making regular Journal entries she was employed by The Neat & Tidy Piano Movers, as I still am.

About three and a half years ago she decided, rather abruptly, that she had had quite enough of the Corporate nonsense that pervaded every single working day and was starting to make inroads in to her non working days.  She negotiated a mutually agreeable exit plan with the Piano Movers and, it is fair to say, she hasn't really looked back.

She took about a year off and "chilled" before taking a voluntary project management role for a Community project and picking up some part time work in a couple of local shops.  She was also an elderly ladies companion for a while, but that role ended when her "lady" was moved in to a Nursing Home and no longer needed 30%'s ministrations and visitations.

I think we were both in agreement that she was not yet ready to embrace the life of a retiree and really did still need something more challenging than selling gin and bananas or visits to Garden Centre Tea Shops to keep her mind active.

The "something challenging" came to pass back in the Autumn of last year when she was offered a job as a receptionist at the local Doctor's Surgery which is literally just over the road from The Pile.

She absolutely loves the job, particularly the social interaction, often with people who aren't at their best. It really does fill her need to look after and care for people and it seems that she is really appreciated after only a few months in the role.

Now that was a bit of a diversion, so back to the 'phone call ... it appears that as well as providing front of house duties at the Surgery, she also has a sideline selling eggs and honey to the staff. She had left a box of eggs on the worktop and she needed me to pop them over and drop them in at the Dispensary for Alison.

Normally I wouldn't have blinked an eye at being asked to complete this minor errand, but the COVID-19 virus outbreak has just been declared a Pandemic and I'm now somewhat wary of heading in to a building whose very purpose is the "go to" place for the sick.*

Now, the advice to the UK public is to call 111 for advise if they think the are showing Coronavirus symptoms. They are specifically advised NOT to visit Surgeries or Hospitals, but I know how bloody stupid some of the British population can be.**

As a consequence I was somewhat less than enthusiastic to visit the local Plague Ship and was bloody certain of using the hand gel on departure.

As for contact with 30%, she's living in the chicken coop until a) she finds a new job, or b) this all blows over.

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* Actually, based on 30%'s anonymised accounts, there are quite a few "regulars" who have nothing at all wrong with them or could self medicate with the most basic of "over the counter" remedies. However this subject is likely to get me on to a full-blown rant about abuse of the National Health Service, so its probably best if I leave it there!
** Why the fuck are people stockpiling toilet paper? Its not as though diarrhoea is even one of the fucking symptoms ... perhaps they are going to self-isolate by swathing themselves in it like some modern day mummy?

I'm still not dead!

Well!

Its certainly been a while since I last put pen to virtual paper to note the comings and goings here at The Pile.

Don't worry though, I'm not going to dump a fifty page narrative of the past three and a half years here for you to read. I'm also not going to make any rash commitments about how frequently I'm going to make an entry in The Journal.

After the best part of four years there is plenty to report, but I am well out of practice, so I think it will be a case of taking it day by day or even week by week and seeing how it goes. Hopefully I will get back in to the proverbial saddle and, over time, fill in the gaps*.

Today was a quiet day at work, so I made best use of my time and got a few items crossed off my mental to-do list.

The most notable was the first hive inspection of the year. It is unseasonably warm and we have had one of the mildest Winters on record, so the bees are out and about collecting pollen and nectar from the snowdrops, crocuses and other early Spring flowers.

Shortly after lunch I threw on my bee suit, lit a smoker and took a very quick look at the 5 hives that are in the garden. Although it is mild, there was no need to perform a full blown inspection, just a quick peek inside the hives to check whether the colonies had made it through the Winter.

All five had survived and had adequate stores of honey in their outer frames. I could see capped and uncapped brood on the central frames, meaning that I had laying Queens in all hives. I even had a quick glimpse of one Queen as I scanned one frame. I have another hive a couple of miles down the road at Kathy H-R's house and I'll try to get over there at some point in the next week to see how they are doing.

Now, I am well aware that this is very, very far from the most earth shattering of Journal posts, especially after such a long absence and there are some quite major changes to report on. But, as I mentioned earlier, let's see how things pan out and, hopefully, I'll bring things up to date over the coming weeks and months.

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* A quick Google search indicates that there are 1,305 days between 14th August 2016 and today, so this may take quite some time!