Instead I'll pick a day or two from the missing six months and attempt to fill in some of the gaps…
… towards the back end of December last year I made it made it to my fiftieth birthday and pessimistically realised that I had just entered my sixth decade. I have to be honest and say that the morning of my birthday was not the happiest I have ever been and I felt quite depressed to have an age that had a five at the beginning rather than a four. This dark cloud didn't hang around for long as I was well aware that I cannot halt the passage of time and I just needed to get over it, and on with things.
Now the transition from one decade to another is seen as a significant event and, unbeknownst* to me, 30% was keen to get me that special something. As I just implied, she was keen for it to be a surprise but a week or so in to the month she had an attack of nerves and demanded that I stopped what I was doing and attended to the iPad.**
She advised that she was tempted to buy me "this" but wanted to be sure that I would like it before she committed to the purchase. I took receipt of the tablet and looked down and there was the website of a classic vehicle dealer showing a Royal Enfield Bullet Classic. It was an Indian made bike with minimal mileage and was only four years old. I was gobsmacked by this thoughtfulness and generosity and stammered a delighted acceptance.
|I now have more space in the garage |
but it really needs tidying
It is fair to say that she is neither the fastest nor the best handling bike I own but she looks truly delightful in the bright sunshine and sounds fantastic. I am tempted to procure a dateless number plate so I can replace the modern yellow acrylic plate with a traditional black plate with white letters and numbers.***
---* I have never used this word in a written sentence and I am fairly sure I haven't voiced it either.
** Yes, this is the jointly owned iPad that I am not allowed to use as, apparently, 30%'s lungs will terminally explode if she lets go of it … She certainly makes a lot of noise when I take it off her!
*** This results in shouts of Hypocrite as I am on record as disparaging those who need to label their vehicle with a piss poor attempt to convey their name whilst being restricted by car registration conventions.****
**** I don't want to spell out my name. I just want to make my bike look forty or fifty years older