The Beast

I had problems getting my act together this morning.  I had jobs that needed to be done, but I just could not get my arse in to gear.

30% busied herself with further tidying of her Pineapple Broom's bed and suggested that we could complete a Tip Run before we needed to head in to Redditch to view the new, old mower.  I grudgingly agreed, fell in to line and soon found myself happily extracting items of garden debris and piling them up by the trailer.

At this point I should probably mention that the previous owner of the cottage was a) a bit of a hoarder and b) a bit of a bodger. The phrase "why do a job properly when you can assemble a half-arsed mess of inappropriate items" accurately sums up his approach. Over the past three years I have removed all sorts of stuff from gaps in the fences and hedges. We assume these were attempts to constrain Archie, their son's Lurcher. And, as for the chicken house, do not get me started on that abomination!*

Right! Back to the Tip Run. Obviously the Porn Mower was destined for recycling and it was joined in the trailer with several large sheets of metal mesh and plastic that had been inserted at various points in our boundary hedges. A few other odds 'n sods were added to the load and off we went to Hanbury tip.

A quick lunch was eaten on our return, before we headed off to Redditch to have a look at the second-hand mower.  It was a Honda engined McCulloch that was originally a self-propelled unit.  Time and some abuse had resulted in the failure of the self-drive functionality and it had been serviced and converted to a push only mower.

It started easily and seems perfect for hacking back the grass and weeds on the rough ground in the orchard. If it only lasts a season it will have earned its keep.

Hands were shaken, money was handed over and the Beast was loaded in to the back of the Defender. We then headed over to Evesham to pick up a prescription and a few comestibles.

Back at home it was time to try out the Beast and it was absolutely brilliant. I spent a merry couple of hours in the orchard and it was only thirst and a need to spray more nettles that brought the fun to a close. 

With a few more hours up there, it will start to look almost civilised.

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* Definitely a crime against carpentry and shed construction in general