Processing Beeswax

Why do I maintain The Journal?  I'm not certain that there is a single reason. 

It is a useful record of how, or when, I have completed certain projects. The recipe for a successful dish, or how I have overcome a particular problem with the bees, or a DIY project at home.

It is also a narrative of the second half of my life. What I have done. Who I have worked with, and for. Tales of holidays and events and even the mundane comings and goings of day-to-day life at home. There are even the occasional snapshots from my younger days, before The Journal was started.

I'm not sure that it has any value to anyone else. I sometime wonder whether TP will ever read it to, perhaps, get a better understanding of his father and his life? I am aware, from the blog statistics, that Journal entries are read by casual visitors,* and I can see which entries have been read. It is quite fun to re-read these entries. It is as though I am using these random visitations by unknown persons, to select and review certain days from my past.

Anyway, enough of that, on to today.

After extracting the honey crop back in May, I was left with a quality of sticky wax cappings.** These had been placed in a couple of feeders and placed on hives #1 and #2. In the intervening weeks the bees in those hives had scrupulously cleaned the honey from the cappings and stored it back in the hives.

This morning I finally got my arse in to gear and removed the feeders from the hives. After shooing away a few bees, I settled down to process the cappings. After cleaning by the bees, they look almost like a drift of coarse sawdust. They have a slight sticky texture due to honey remnants and the nature of the wax itself.

Stage one of this process is to melt down the cappings in boiling water. I use an old rice cooker, and I soon had a slightly aromatic brown liquid bubbling away in the cooker.  This was poured through an old sieve in to a plastic container and was left to cool for a few hours.

While the wax was cooling I attended to the feeders, which were slightly sticky and the bees had even started to build brace comb*** in them. I found that careful application of a hot air gun, on its lowest setting, would melt the wax and it could be cleaned off with a cloth. The plastic feeders were then put through the dishwasher and have come out beautifully clean.

I then returned to the wax and removed it from the plastic container. The underside of the wax is covered with a layer of black sludge comprised of pollen, and other debris from the hive. This is scraped away to leave a disk of beeswax. It still has impurities and will need to be melted and filtered again before it it suitable for making candles, leather cream or furniture polish ... but that can wait until tomorrow.

My only other achievement was that I grabbed my clippers and gave Wilson a lamb clip. I have to say that he was really very good, and I am very please with the result. I will point out that I have yet to clip his feet, so it does look like he is wearing Ugg boots!

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* I do wonder how they come across an anonymous little blog, that makes no attempt to appeal to the masses, and what they actually think of it when they get here?

** These have to be cut from the honey comb to enable the honey to be harvested

*** Brace comb is a term used to describe the clusters of wax cells that bees will construct in an attempt to fill large spaces; often between the frames and the floor and sides of the hive. In this case, in an attempt to fill the feeder.

Roasting!

Today was forecast to be the hottest day of the current heatwave, with temperatures expected to be in the low to mid 30's.

We were up early and shut the curtains on the side of the house that gets the sun.  The living room is naturally quite cool, and we hoped that keeping the room in shade, would make it a reasonably pleasant sanctuary in the heat of the day.

We then headed out to the garden and ensured that the young plants were watered. 

Having sorted the house and garden, we retreated indoors and looked for something to occupy our time away from the heat of the day. 30% headed upstairs for an extended period of tidying. I wandered in to the utility room and made a start on a long overdue task; descaling the coffee maker. 

This little job always takes much longer than expected and I was still faffing around with the filter as 30% declared it was time for lunch.

In the afternoon 30% headed out to enjoy the air-conditioned delights of the supermarket, while I pulled on my bee suit for this week's inspection of the hives.

I only inspected hives #2 and #3 today. Hive #1 had a new queen introduced on Wednesday, and I can see little point in opening up that hive until next Monday.* The inspected hives are doing well. Hive #2 is the stronger colony and has about five frames of capped brood. Hive #3 is smaller with three frames of capped brood, but I have no concerns about either of them.

The colony inspections probably took about forty minutes, but I was sweltering by the time I had finished. I retreated to the shade and relative cool of the house and took a siesta for the rest of the afternoon.

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* With a queen introduction it is a case of "they will, or they won't", i.e. the colony will either accept her or kill her. I left the colony queenless for a couple of days, before I introduced the new queen, which should make them more amenable to accepting her, but fundamentally, the matter is out of my hands. If the queen is accepted by the colony, she will take a few days or even weeks to settle in and start to lay. Hence, there is no rush to open up the hive.

Days of rest

 This week my afternoons have featured very long siestas, combined with a tendency to do as little as possible.  Perhaps I came back from the European trip more exhausted than I thought?

So, it will come as no surprise that today was another lazy day.

We headed out down the lane with the dogs early, before the heat set in. We were out and back before nine o'clock, but it was still very warm by the time we returned home.

My morning was spent working on The Journal entry covering the bike trip, and the main points from another couple of days were noted down.

The afternoon included another huge sleep, before we got ourselves tidied up. This evening we joined Bubbles and Bobbyn for a curry at The Mother Huff Cap at Great Alne. 

This restaurant and bar specialises in Nepalese and Indian food and we had a rather good curry. I may seem a little churlish, but that was all I can say. It was a decent curry. For some reason I am no longer as enthused by a curry as I used to be, and now regard it as a spiced chicken or lamb stew, nothing more.

Don't get me wrong, I do like a curry, but I now find little to rave about. There are plenty of good Indian Restaurants in these parts that serve decent food but, but after forty odd years of eating their food, I find their menus are all pretty similar, and the same can be said for the eating experience.

Perhaps I need to try one of the Michelin starred Indian Restaurants?

Another haircut

 Saturday turned out to be very similar to Friday.

The weather is very warm, but the skies are frequently overcast, and there is an annoying wind that deters me from gardening. Mind you, it is so dry out there, that we are doing little more than watering at present.

So, my preference is to stay indoors at the moment, and I needed something to justify this.

With the clippers still unboxed, from yesterday's grooming session, it was now Hobson's turn. The Grooming School have reported that he can be an utter pain to clip, but I found him to be quite well behaved. 

By lunchtime I had trimmed his coat back with a #5F blade and he was looking rather smart with a neat topknot and ears.  I should mention that he now looked quite tidy, provided that you didn't look at his feet.

After lunch I attempted to tidy up his feet, and that was the point when his cooperative nature dissipated. He obviously doesn't like the sensation of the clippers on his toes.

I also found that my Heiniger mini clipper just wouldn't work on the hair around his toes. It may be that the blade needs sharpening, so, for the moment, it looks like I will have to persevere with a full sized clipper and blade ... he isn't going to like that at all!

It's warming up

 A heatwave is expected over the next few days, with temperatures expected to peak in the low 30's on Monday.

Both 30% and I enjoy the warm weather, but it is no fun for the dogs. Both Whiffler and Hobson currently have quite long coats. It is, therefore, time for them to be clipped.

A couple of #5FC (6.3mm) blades* were ordered a couple of days ago, and were due to arrive today. In the meantime, I set to trimming Whiffler's topknot and ears. It seems that the students at the grooming school have opted to style Whiffler with a luxuriant topknot and ears.  These have developed tangles and knots over recent weeks and it is time for some serious pruning.

I spent this morning attending to his coiffure with anti-tangle spray, a comb and hairdressing scissors. After much faffing around, I am reasonably pleased with the result.  Although, I have to admit that, as long as the scissors are close at hand, there is always a tendency to just tidy up a minor imperfection.

Phil the postie arrived with perfect timing, and the #5 blades were unpacked and put to work.

Over the next couple of hours, Whiffler's coat was shorn right back. We took several breaks to allow him to rest, and for me to vacuum up the clippings.

At the end of the day, he looks quite respectable, and I just need to tidy up his rear feet to finish off the job.

As I mentioned yesterday, Whiffler is about to celebrate his eleventh birthday, and it is apparent that he now a senior citizen. The Grooming School have advised that he copes with grooming sessions well, but I have my suspicions that there is an element of self-interest involved.

He has a very calm nature and is, therefore, an ideal candidate for an inexperienced student. Today I noticed how quickly he became fatigued. It is definitely time he was retired and groomed at his own pace at home.

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* #7FC blades cut the coat to 3.1mm, which is probably a little short when we consider when they are next scheduled to be clipped.

Peaked too early

As the title of today's Journal entry suggests, I most definitely peaked too early today.

I was out of the house by half past seven this morning for a check-up with the Ophthalmologist. Amazingly, I was seen, tested and exiting the clinic before my eight thirty appointment time. My IOP readings are good and, apparently, my readings and scans will be reviewed by a practitioner, and I'll be alerted if there are any concerns.

I was home by nine o'clock, and had time for a quick coffee before Whiffler and Wilson were bundled in to the car for an appointment at the Vet's.

We wanted to check on Wilson's vaccination status and Whiffler has developed a fleshy lump on his lower lip. 

Whiffler had a similar growth a couple of years ago, which was removed. We had had the growth tested, at that time, and it was found to be a malignant melanoma. We were obviously concerned that the melanoma had returned.

Our Vet checked out Wilson and his medical history and confirmed that he was up to date with his jabs. She also gave him a once over, as he is scheduled to be castrated on the 7th of July. With Wilson checked over, it was now Whiffler's turn.

Emma the Vet had a long look at the lump and then fetched Whiffler's paper records to check the date and diagnosis of the previous lump. She confirmed that it was likely to be a return of the melanoma, and recommended that we get it excised.

She added that he was in great shape for an eleven year old dog and that it had been two years since the previous growth had been removed. In that time he had not developed any other symptoms or growths. It was therefore her opinion that the operation was worthwhile. 

She commented that, if the growth returned in a similar timescale, he would be a very senior thirteen years old.

So, now both Whiffler and Wilson will be going under the knife on the seventh.

Back at home I had an enormous kip on the sofa, before hauling my lazy backside outside. I managed to get the water butts filled from the well,* but little else.

I did say that I peaked too early today.

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* I checked the level and it is currently about 12' below ground level. I replaced the well pump back in 2023, and, at that time, calculated that it is about 50' deep.

Back in the groove

Wilson is settling in nicely, and, day by day, we are becoming familiar with his personality. 

It is fair to say that he is a good boy, but can be a little possessive and temperamental. His temper usually manifests as the occasional growl or barking, but these are becoming fewer as time passes.  He is wary of TP, and it is possible that this is because he originally lived in a home with a young man with anger issues.

However, the relationship with TP is improving slowly, and each visit will, hopefully, reduce Wilson's anxiety.

We also have Wilson booked in for castration in a couple of weeks, which should help with curbing his  hormonal behaviour.

Now, the reason I started with a summary of Wilson's progress was because today I unboxed the clippers as I planned to trim the fur on his face. This is another of those canine care activities that could go horribly wrong! 30% has been brushing him regularly and he seems to be quite happy with grooming, but, as they say, "the proof of the pudding is in the eating".

I put a #10 blade in the clippers and sat Wilson down. I have to say that he was an absolute angel to clip, and didn't even wriggle as I ran the blades over the sensitive end of his nose and over his eyes. 

That is another significant milestone passed in his integration in to our little pack.*

Phil the postie turned up shortly before lunch and carefully handed over a small package marked Live Animals in Transit. He is familiar with the honey bee requeening process, as he has delivered a few in previous years, and is interested in how the hives are doing.

I carefully opened the package and checked that the queen was alright. She is not particularly large, and I can only hope that her size will increase as she settles in to the hive and starts to lay.** I placed a drop of water on the queen cage*** and put it in a cool dark place until I was ready to introduce her to her new home.

The introduction took place in the early afternoon, and all I can do now is wait a week and hope that the requeening is successful.

The rest of the afternoon was spent thinning my carrots. I really must remember to dilute the seed more when I next sow a crop, as I pulled hundreds of mini carrots from the raised bed to make space for my crop.

So, here ends Wednesday's Journal entry. I'm definitely back home and back in the groove.

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* Mind you, I haven't clipped his feet yet!

** The massive assumption here is that the colony accepts her, rather than deciding that she is an intruder, and killing her!

*** I had no idea how long she had been in transit, so wanted to ensure that she, and her attendant workers, were hydrated.

Now I need to crack on with the garden

 It was important that I found time to inspect the hives yesterday, as they really should be looked at every seven or eight days from late March through to September. Fortunately the colonies had showed no sign of swarming nor starvation, and no other problems had arisen whilst I was away.

With the bees taken care of, I had nothing that I must do today, and I found time to take stock of the garden.

In my regular calls to 30%, she had indicated that the weather had been very hot, with not a drop of rain.  I could see that she had not been exaggerating. I was shocked to see parched areas and virtually no sign of growth on the lawns ... there was no way they would need mowing until after this dry spell breaks.

I decide to settle back in to garden mode gently and spent some time this morning removing the side shoots from the tomatoes and tying the vines up to their supports. I also took a quick look at my carrot seedlings and added "thin carrots" to my virtual to-do list.*

That was pretty much all I achieved today, other than a monumental kip in the afternoon ... the bike tour was obviously more tiring than I thought!

There was one other episode from today that I felt was worth mentioning. 

A few weeks ago 30% commented that she had found some droppings up in the orchard that were significantly larger than one would expect from the occasional Muntjac visitor.  We have a trail camera, and, a couple of weeks ago, I set this up overlooking one of the larger gaps in the hedgerow to the adjacent fields.

This morning I removed the camera and sifted through the video clips. I can report that we can add Fallow Deer to the list of orchard visitors, as we had a couple of clips clearly showing this large deer with their unmistakeable dappled coat. There were also rabbits, muntjac and several appearances by a fox.**

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* That list also has "investigate parsnips" to see if I can find anything worth saving amongst the weeds!

** The little sod is even coming in daylight, which means 30%'s plan to release the chickens will have to be put on hold.

I'm back

 I made it back from the Black Forest tour yesterday afternoon.

Once I have had time to collect my thoughts, I'll summarise where we went, what we did and how I just about managed to avoid telling one of the group that he was an overbearing know-it-all prick!

But, for now, I'll just run over my first day back at home. It relates, mostly, to bees and honey.

TP stopped over last night and asked for a couple of jars of honey to take back to Cardiff. 30% had reported that honey had been selling well over the past ten days. In other words; supplies were low. So first job of the day was to get a batch of honey warmed, bottled and labelled.

While it slowly liquified in a hot water bath, TP and I took the dogs for a walk down the lane. On our return I got the first batch bottled, and set another batch to liquify.

We all lunched together and TP headed off home shortly after.

I then needed a restorative nap, before I donned my bee suit and headed up to the hives.

I started with Hive #3, and was delighted to report that the queen has finally started to lay. I could see plenty of larvae and two frames of capped worker brood. I added a queen excluder and a super to the hive and hope that the colony will increase significantly over the next few weeks.

Hive #2 was next on my list. It, too, is doing really well. There are several frames of brood and I caught sight of the queen as she wandered across the frames. The colony temperament is not too bad. They were prone to get a little stroppy, but soon calmed with a couple of puffs from the smoker.  I'll keep any eye on them and see if they settle over time.

I finally got to Hive #3, and it was exactly as expected. The little brood present was predominantly drone brood, and this is definitely indicative of a failing queen. I located her quite easily and euthanised her. I then promptly hit the internet and got a new queen ordered ... she should be here in the next couple of days.

So that's it for my first day back. It's lovely to be home, in the company of 30% and the dogs.  I've had an interesting break and will, eventually, get around to jotting down my traveller's tales.

2025 Motorcycle Tour to The Black Forest

 Friday, 13th June

Home to Folkestone - 186 miles, 3h 52 mins

The original plan for today was to travel down to Folkestone with TP's friend, Charlie. Charlie had advised that he wouldn't be able to leave work until mid afternoon. This meant that we would hit the M25 during Friday evening rush hour. He also wanted to go across the Cotswolds rather than take the M40, which would further prolong what was going to be a lengthy trip anyway ... I should have taken note of this, as his predilection for poor planning became apparent during the following days.

Fortunately he managed to get out of work early, and I managed to persuade him that we would make better time if we stuck to the motorways. We left home shortly after one o'clock and arrived at the Travelodge in Folkestone about four hours later.

The traffic on the M25 was predictably heavy and some aggressive filtering was needed to get through the congested sections around Heathrow and the M3 junctions. 

TP had already arrived in Folkestone, and was working his way down a beer as we pulled up in the carpark. We checked in, and had a relaxing evening, before hitting the sack early, in preparation for the Channel crossing tomorrow.

At this point I should mention that my back had stood up to four hours in the saddle rather well. I was cautiously optimistic that I could manage ten days of riding ... provided I took precautionary painkillers each day.

Saturday, 14th June

Folkestone to Liege - 199 miles, 5h 3 mins

It was a short run from the hotel to the Channel Tunnel terminal, where we met up with TP's cousin, Rob. It was then a matter of checking in and waiting in a holding area before being called to board.

One comment on the boarding process, is that it is a bit of a faff on a motorcycle. There is a need to stop and remove your gloves to check in and then you are given a boarding pass that is supposed to be displayed. We noted that more seasoned travellers had come prepared with a clothes peg to fix them to the screen of their bike.

British and French passport control booths are separated by a 50 meter stretch.  One needs to stop, remove gloves, locate and hand over one's passport and then remove one's helmet for identification verification purposes. It was then necessary to reclothe, drive a short distance and do the same all over again.

While negotiating passport control I forgot the width of my bike's panniers and managed to scrape the right one as I left the UK booth. I also managed to get separated from TP, Charlie and Rob, and ended up completing the crossing solo on a completely different train.

The tunnel crossing was uneventful. After descending a very steep ramp, the motorcycles were directed on to the train. We parked up, and left our bikes on their side stands, before dismounting and relaxing for the 35 minute journey. The vehicle carriages are not brightly lit, and have a distinct aroma of rubber and vehicle exhausts. It was vaguely reminiscent of a suburban bus station late at night.

After arriving in France it was a case of following the exit signs towards the motorway. Fortunately there was a service station immediately outside the French terminal and I waited there for the chaps to arrive about twenty minutes later.

It was then a long motorway slog towards Liege. The French and Belgian countryside was flat and mostly agricultural. Much of this area was heavily impacted during the Second World War, and rebuilt during the 50's and 60's. The flatness and similarly aged buildings and infrastructure gave me the sense that I was riding across a huge model railway ... even down to the small herds of cows in little fenced fields.

Our first night abroad was spent in the Yust Hostel. The heat of the day brought on a terrific thunderstorm this evening and we watched the storm from the rooftop bar of the hotel. It is fair to say we were relieved that we weren't riding in such torrential rain.

It had been another long day and we were all glad of a comfortable bed that night

Sunday, 15th June

Liege to Heidelberg - 222 miles, 4h approx

It was another long day in the saddle as we headed towards the Black Forest. The riding times I have indicated are approximate and do not take account of the breaks that are needed to rest aching shoulders and sore backsides.

As we left Liege the landscape and roads started to change and we were rewarded with the sight of rolling, forested hills. The roads were high quality with very little traffic.  They featured fast sweeping bends and we crossed high bridges over verdant valleys. It was a welcome change after the motorways of the preceding couple of days.

We actually spent much of the day riding; eventually arriving and checking in to the Meininger Hotel on Carl Benz Strasse in Heidelberg.

We took a tram in to the city centre for our evening meal, and dined at a fairly anonymous Euro Restaurant.  I think I had a gourmet burger. I am rapidly coming to the conclusion that there is some damned good food on the continent, but their beef is quite average, neither good, nor bad, just average.

Monday, 16th June

Odenwald, Heidelberg - 95 miles, 4h approx

Our plans* included a two night stay in Heidelberg, and this meant that we could enjoy a day riding without being encumbered with our luggage.  

Today we headed up in to the Odenwald. This is a region of low mountains to the North West of Heidelberg and we had a quite splendid day riding lovely twisty roads through forests and mountains.

By this point the structure of our days had become established. We would leave the hotel or hostel relatively early and fill up with fuel. We would then ride for about an hour, before hunting down a bakery or patisserie for a breakfast pastry and a coffee.

A further hour, or two, of riding would follow, and another break would be taken to rest aching bums and have some lunch.  In the afternoons we rode until we decided that we had had enough for the day.

Now back to the circuit of the Odenwald.  As we headed back in to Heidelberg late in the afternoon, Rob and I became separated from TP and Charlie.  Charlie was becoming quite overbearing and had insisted that Google Maps would be ideal for navigating the final leg of today's ride. After becoming separated, Rob and I found that it, most definitely, was not!

The bloody software was trying to take us out of Heidelberg to a previous way point, rather than back towards our hotel.  We pulled up, and this is a convenient point in my narrative to mention the weather. It was abso-fucking-lutely sweltering. The temperature was in the mid to high twenties,** and helmets, gloves and riding gear meant that we were dripping!

Now back to the narrative, Rob and I pulled in to the side of the road by the river within sight of the castle. After a few minutes with my phone and BMW satellite navigation software, we soon had a route planned back to the hotel. 

This was the first time that I had used the BMW navigation functionality "in anger" and it performed faultlessly. The phone and bike screens work in tandem providing a map view and turn by turn instructions. My helmet intercom also provides audio instructions.

Rob stuck to my tail light like glue and we were soon able to see the familiar sight of the hotel looming in front of us. It wasn't long before we were able to park our bikes, shed our riding gear and sink a very refreshing beer.

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* When I say "our" plans, it was rapidly becoming apparent that I actually mean "Charlie's" plans.  As the days passed it became clear that we were doing exactly what Charlie wanted.  He would ask for the group's views, but the final decision always seemed to be what Charlie proposed in the first place.

** ℃

Tuesday, 17th June

Heidelberg to Baden Baden - 50 miles, approx

Today we left Heidelberg behind and headed down the Rhine valley towards the spa town of Baden Baden.  We elected to take a twisty route and ended up riding through the back streets of, seemingly conjoined, villages and towns that were scattered along the bank of the river.

In the hot weather it wasn't fun and a decision to use faster roads didn't seem to make much difference.

We stopped short of Baden Baden in a town called Rastatt and spent an interesting hour taking a tour of the Schloss Rastatt; a baroque palace built between 1700 and 1707. 

After that bit of culture, we lunched nearby at a pleasant pavement eatery, before travelling the final few miles to The Tribe hotel in Baden Baden.

Rob (the bastard!) called shotgun to share a room with TP, which meant that I was bunked with Charlie. Now Charlie has sleep apnoea, which meant that I would need to wear ear plugs to stand a chance of getting a decent nights sleep. He is also of Hagrid like proportions and can easily fill any room! I was also becoming less enamoured with his company, as his overbearing know-it-all nature began to grate. It seems that he had holidayed in Germany with his parents as a child, and was, therefore, an expert on all things Germanic!

Wednesday, 18th June

The B500 - 180 miles (min), 5h 57 mins

We were scheduled to stay in Baden Baden for two nights, so, today, we were able to remove our motorcycle luggage and explore the twists and turns of the B500, without bulky panniers.  The UK motorcycle press has extolled the virtues of this fantastic road, and our plan was to see just how good it was.

It is fair to say that it is a beautiful road, well surfaced, with very little traffic, that took us through beautiful Black Forest scenery. The road really did have it all; mile long tunnels, hairpin bends, exquisite views and, without doubt, the most complicated corners I have ever encountered. Some of them were blind 180° turns that seemed to go on forever! 

It was apparent that either the R1250R, or me, was off the pace,* when compared to the rest of the group, and I spent my time bringing up the rear.

I will, however, maintain that this was a key riding position, as Rob had neither satellite navigation nor an intercom. It was therefore vital that the last man was able to a) find his way home, and b) alert the front-runners of any problems.

I'm not sure that TP or Charlie are particularly strong on group riding etiquette, as would become apparent later.

As the day wore on physical fatigue set in,** and I was also becoming weary of Charlie's manner.*** After a break for lunch, I decided to leave the lads to another run along the B500 and made my own way back towards Baden Baden.

I found it incredibly liberating to be making my own way about the country. I was dependent on no-one and had no pressure to maintain a pace I didn't feel comfortable with. My route back was fantastic and featured a long winding stretch through a valley alongside a little river. It was quite beautiful riding past farms and hay meadows with the mountains and forests rising around me.

I found my way back without incident or wrong turns and was showered and sinking my second beer by the time the others got back from their ride.

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* Probably me!

** I am twice the age of the rest of the group

*** I mentioned to both TP and Charlie that I wanted to stop for breakfast quite early in our day. This was promptly ignored and we didn't break until just before midday! This is not great for a Type 1 diabetic.

Thursday, 19th June

Baden Baden to Verdun, France - 165 miles, 5h 14 mins

Yesterday evening Charlie attempted to persuade the group that we should stay a further night in Baden Baden and explore the area further.

This was the point that I lost patience with him and call it out as a fucking stupid idea. Our train through the Channel Tunnel was early on Sunday morning. This meant that we had three days to cover approximately 650 kilometres ( over 400 miles). 

I pointed out that the weather was extremely hot and that attempting to ride four hundred miles in two days would require extended rest stops and left no contingency in case of accidents or break downs. I also pointed out that Rob had an earlier crossing on Saturday evening, which would place further pressure on him.

Allowing three days for the journey back to Calais was a far better plan. It would allow us to take a more leisurely run through the French countryside, rather than a two day slog up motorways.

Charlie's proposal was typical of the crap he had been spouting all week. Ill thought out, not taking account of the group's wishes and only aligned with his personal desires and agenda. As the tour progressed it had become apparent that it really was all about what Charlie wanted to do.

So, yesterday evening I had proposed Verdun as our destination for today and after much debate Charlie grudgingly accepted that Verdun looked like a nice place to stop. A hostel was booked and we decided on an early start.

We checked out of the hotel shortly after eight in the morning, and were soon navigating our way out of the town. I have already mentioned the lack of group riding etiquette, and within a few miles TP, Charlie and Rob filtered down the outside of a narrowing two lane system, leaving me stuck behind heavy traffic.

I continued, hoping to catch sight of them, but it became apparent that we had taken different routes. Fortunately I had entered our destination in to the BMW's satellite navigation system, so I just kept heading towards Verdun in the vain hope that I might bump in to them.

After about half an hour TP called, and asked where I was. I pointed out that I was now a good distance further on and I could see little point in attempting to find each other. I told him, possibly quite abruptly, that I would make my own way to Verdun and see them later.

Again, I had a tiring, but quite splendid time riding through the French countryside. I had chosen a twisty route that was predominantly on D (minor) roads.  The roads were mostly equivalent to UK B and C class roads. All were quiet and I swear that I saw more cows than cars today.

Much of my route was comprised of twists and turns and there were times when I seemed to be going back on myself. I rode through beautiful countryside and deserted villages. I had hoped to find a pavement cafe, for refreshments, with elderly French Gentlemen smoking Gauloise cigarettes, but I saw nothing for hours on end. At certain points the roads straightened and went for miles over rolling hills without a single bend. These straights were quite incredible to ride.

I really was enjoying riding on my own. I am a capable person but sometimes lack confidence in new situations, and was taking a great degree of satisfaction and pleasure that I was making my own way through France without support or direction.

I arrived in Verdun at about three o'clock and entered the town over the canal bridge that faces the fine turreted gateway to the old town. A few minutes later I pulled up outside the hostel on Avenue Garibaldi. 

The hostel reception did not open for another couple of hours, so I grabbed a pain au chocolat and some water from a nearby bakery and relaxed and read in the shade in a nearby park.

I was eventually able to practise my school boy French and check in to the hostel shortly after five. Having carried my bags to the room, I was parking my bike in the underground carpark, when the boys finally arrived.

Over dinner our plans for the next couple of days were discussed. It became apparent that Charlie thought Calais was a dump and was planning to spend Saturday night in Lille. Now Lille is over an hour from Calais, which meant that the Sunday ride home would be well over five hours of riding not counting breaks.  That might suit TP and Charlie, but my new found independence had given me a far better idea.

Friday, 20th June

Verdun to Fourmies - 109 miles, 4h approx

TP selected our destination for this evening's stopover. 

Fourmies is a nondescript little town, with little to recommend it other than its convenient location within striking distance of Lille and Calais. 

As we prepared to set off, I informed the lads that I would be riding solo again today, and that I would meet them in Fourmies that evening.

I had another splendid day riding twisty roads through deserted villages and hamlets. Traffic was minimal, although I did have an exciting moment when I met a milk tanker on a single track road. I pulled in as close to the side as I could and the driver was an absolute gentleman ... he pulled right on to the verge to give me ample room.

At one point my route took me along a kilometre of road that was so badly degraded that barely 15% of the surface was tarmac. The remainder was rutted and covered with loose gravel. There was, of course, the obligatory strip of weeds up the centre of the track. I can now claim that I have definitely ridden my bike off road.

At this point I should add that the terribly clunky, grinding gearbox of the R1250R seems to be finally smoothing out. It isn't perfect, but, over the last couple of days, the gear changes seem much smoother, although in and out of third can still be unpleasant. The Dealership advised that I just needed to get through some miles on the bike, but, in response, I ask "what manufacturer would put out a product that was initially so unpleasant to use?" The current BMW Boxer engines seem to be constructed to create an initial, and possibly long lasting, negative perception by their owners.

I arrived in Fourmies mid-afternoon. The town looked as exciting as Bromsgrove,* but the hotel was pleasantly located in woodland next to a small lake.  I was soon checked in and enjoyed a long shower to remove the sweat and dust accumulated after many hours in the saddle.

As I reviewed my day, I realised that I had ridden over a hundred miles on roads that were the same quality, or worse than the Three Miler.**

After cleaning up, I wandered down to the lake and enjoyed an enormous ice cream. This brought on instant fatigue, and I took a long afternoon nap. I woke just before the arrival of TP, Charlie and Rob. 

Fourmies dining options were incredibly limited, so TP and Charlie were dispatched in to town in search of sustenance. They returned with beer and pizza, which was consumed al fresco.

As already mentioned, TP and Charlie planned to spend tomorrow night in Lille, wake early on Sunday and ride for over an hour to get to Calais; the mandated hour before their 10.24 tunnel crossing.

Rob needed to be in Calais for a Saturday evening tunnel crossing, and I thought that Calais was the best stopover for me too. There was no way that I wanted to extend my Sunday ride unnecessarily by over an hour. I therefore booked a room in Calais and let the TP and Charlie know of my plans.

I think Rob was relieved to know that he would have company on the ride to Calais, especially as I had satellite navigation.

---

* i.e. "not very"

** A UK "C" class road, less than 4m wide.

Saturday, 21st June

Fourmies to Calais, via Lille - 143 miles, 4h approx

So Saturday panned out as follows.

We left Fourmies relatively early in the day and headed, via a fast route, up to Lille. 

Again, the weather was roasting, and we were all melting by the time we arrived in the city. The crawl through the midday, city traffic added to the discomfort and I was glad to shuck off my jacket when we eventually parked.

We lunched at a little sandwich bar in a slightly scruffy area away from the city centre. The food was great. It was just unfortunate that the aroma from the local plumbing was less than savoury.

As we lunched, TP and Charlie attempted to reserve a room for the night and found that there was nowhere economical available in Lille. They, instead, decided to head in to Belgium and stay at a cheap Airbnb they had found.*

After eating, and relaxing in the shade of trees within sight of the Museum of Beaux Arts, we went our separate ways. Rob and I headed on to Calais,** whilst TP and Charlie nipped across the Belgian border.

It was another couple of hours riding to reach Calais, and I waved farewell to Rob as he headed towards the Channel Tunnel terminal and I peeled off the autoroute in to the town.

Within five minutes I had located, and checked in to my Faulty Towers esque hotel. Any remaining pressures lifted as I knew I was only a nine minute ride away from the Tunnel terminal. I got myself clean, changed in to fresh clothing and had a damned good snooze before heading out to find something to eat.

Earlier in the week Charlie had turned up his nose at the idea of staying Calais, describing it as "a shit hole." TP had parroted this opinion, although neither of them could offer any evidence to back up this opinion. I decided to explore with an open mind.

I selected a nearby brasserie for my evening meal and wandered in to town. Within about eight minutes I was presented with a loud dance music and a group of impressive drag queens posing outside a club. As I rounded the corner I located my chosen eatery, which had a live synth rock group performing 1980's covers just outside.

The town was absolutely pumping, and I had a splendid evening. The live band was brilliant, performing numbers by The Cure, Joy Division, Depeche Mode and many others. My meal was very good too and L'Hovercraft deserves a special mention as they were quite happy for me to dine alone, despite the fact that the town was rammed and, by the time I left, people were queuing for tables.

After the band had finished their set, I headed back to the hotel and had an early night, after setting my alarm and configuring the sat nav to take emergency to the Terminal.

---

* When they tried to contact the owner, they discovered that it was a scam rental posting, and ended up spending the night in Bruges. The cynic in me thinks that this is exactly what Charlie had wanted all along, as he had been proposing that we stay the last night in Bruges since day #1.

** Rob had no satellite navigation, and admitted that he was glad to have me guide him out of Lille and on up to Calais. He hadn't looked forward to attempting to get there using Post-it Notes with scrawled directions.

Sunday, 22nd June

Calais to Home - 190 miles, 4h 30mins approx

I had a reasonable night's sleep, but it was very hot and humid and my room lacked any form of air-conditioning.

On waking, first order of the day was to pack, and then I wandered outside to put my bags in the bike's panniers. On my return I enquired what time breakfast was served* and, fortuitously, had asked just as the restaurant opened.

A couple of croissants and a pain au chocolat were selected from the buffet, and washed down with a strong black coffee.

I then headed back to my room and had a quick call from 30%.  I realised that I wanted to get home, and there was no point in waiting another hour for my scheduled train. I checked out, got on my bike and ten minutes later I was riding in to the Calais Tunnel Terminal.

I checked in and was allocated a place on a train leaving an hour earlier than my planned departure. The Channel Tunnel operations process seems to group motorcyclists together, so I had like minded company to chat to as I waited for my train.

I departed Calais on the 09.24 train**, and arrived in Folkestone shortly after nine o'clock. The M25 was the usual ball ache, and even with filtering, it took me a good four and a half hours to get home. I had a brief stop at Clacket Lane services for fuel and a coffee, but the rest of the time was spent in the saddle, riding as fast as the traffic would allow.

I was amazed at how congested the M25 was, considering I was riding around it on a Sunday morning.

It is fair to say that I was glad to be home. I had enjoyed the trip, particularly proving to myself that I was able to travel independently abroad on my bike. 

Would I do it again? Yes! But next time I will be setting my own agenda. I'll happily ride with the lads, but if I don't fancy their route or destination, I'll do what I want instead.

---

* "Bonjour Monsieur, le petit déjeuner, a quelle heure est il?" I am amazed at how much of my schoolboy French is still lurking in the recesses of my mind, and that I can manage to hold a basic conversation ... Note: Basic conversation!

** local time (BST +1hr)

Packing and last minute jobs

My main achievement for Thursday is that I have now, mostly, packed my bags in preparation for the trip to Germany.

I wisely purchased a pair of inner bags for my panniers, and this made packing a doddle. These are now sat on the bedroom floor, and will be put on the bike tomorrow. 

A sad commentary on my age is the ridiculous quantity of prescription and non-prescription medicines that completely fill one sub-compartment of my rather natty luggage.*

Once I was reasonably assured that I could survive a week with the items that I had packed, I headed out to the garage and adjusted the screen angle of the ConnectedRide cradle. Hopefully that will make the phone screen easier to see.  I also made a tweak to the phone settings in the hope that the sat nav instructions will be audible.

My back is no worse, and I still plan to make a judgement on arrival in Folkestone.

My final must do was to take a look at the bees before I abandon them for ten days.

I found the queen quite easily in Hive #3, but there is still no sign of eggs or brood. I hope it is just a case of she is taking her time to settle in and start to lay.

Hive #2 is doing really well. I didn't spot the queen, but the four frames of capped brood indicate that she is present and building up the strength of the colony.

I finally got to Hive #1. I found the queen quite easily, and, as with the last inspection, there is very little brood in the colony. I think she is failing, and was hoping to find supersedure cells, but, so far, nothing. If the colony is the same when I return from Germany I think I will requeen it.

Right, that's it ... I'm just about ready to go.

---

* insulin, vitamins, eye drops or various types ... the list goes on ... and on!

Well that works!

 The back is certainly no worse today, but I'm not sure whether it is any better.

I dosed up on painkillers this morning, and decided to do as little as possible. I did, however, have a couple of must dos that could not be put off.

After a lazy morning, I headed out to the garage and fitted the panniers to my bike. I then installed the BMW ConnectedRide cradle and slotted in my mobile phone. Bike, cradle and phone paired automatically, and it was then a moments work to access the Motorrad app and type in a destination.

Within a couple of minutes I was off down the road and was truly impressed with the performance of the Satellite Navigation system and the way it operates in conjunction with the bike's LCD screen. The instructions are clear and the map view on the phone is lovely and clear. I'm really pleased that I bought the cradle and it is much less costly than the BMW Satellite Navigation unit.*

There were a couple of niggles ... I need to adjust the angle of the ConnectedRide cradle and the audio volume on my Fodsport intercom is still bloody crap!

As for riding with my unloaded** panniers for the first time ... I didn't notice they were attached.

Finally, my back ... It's no worse, but no better. I plan to ride down to Folkestone on Friday and make a judgement on Saturday morning. As I mentioned yesterday; the last thing I want is to be stranded in Germany with a bike I can't ride.

---

* Which has very poor reviews

** I plan to pack light.

I hope it's not serious

 I woke this morning with a twinge my back.

It was nothing awful, but I had definitely done something to it. Looking back, I had mowed the back lawns yesterday and also loaded an exercise bike in to the trailer. 

I wondered if I had pulled a muscle, while hoping that it wasn't a recurrence of the problems I had with my back in 2023.

With the German motorcycle tour getting underway on Friday, an injured back was the last thing I wanted. My inner hypochondriac went in to overdrive, and had me imagining being stranded in Deutschland unable to ride my motorcycle.

I took a couple of ibuprofen and decided to have a lazy day. Unfortunately the pills didn't lessen the pain, so I upped the anti and took couple of Tramadol too. 

For the uninitiated this is the pharmacological equivalent of downing half a bottle of good wine. I subsequently spent the next three hours dozing on my bed.

Dot 'n Dave paid a visit in the afternoon and we spent a few hours sitting in the sun catching up with each others' news.

On their departure I downed another couple of Tramadol and snoozed on the sofa for the evening. 

I was so out out it, I didn't bother to eat.*

---

* 30% was out with the cinema club

How big is it?

Monday started with the obligatory dog walk.

Having ticked that off the list, I then entered a period of extended pottering. This included fascinating activities, such as an inspection of the tomatoes in the greenhouse, and watering of the veg patch.

It was during this light gardening that 30% happened to mention that she "was going to pick up an exercise bike this evening".

Now this didn't come as a massive surprise, as she wants to improve her level of fitness, and had just missed out on buying a recumbent exercise bike at the weekend.

I should also point out that I am fully aware of the actual meaning of "I'm going to collect an exercise bike this evening." What this really means is "I'm going to pick up an exercise bike this evening and you're coming to help me ... whether you want to, or not!"

There is no way that 30% would be able to load an exercise bike in to her car on her own and no guarantee that the seller would be willing to assist.  My assistance was therefore mandated.  At this point I enquired as to the size of the exercise bike and whether it would fit in the car.  

My dear wife hadn't thought to ask either of these questions during the negotiations for the purchase of this exercise equipment ... She never ceases to amaze me with both her optimism and complete lack of forethought.

So, after an afternoon that included mowing the lawns at the back of the house, and the replacement of the LED strip light in the shed, we headed in to deepest, darkest Redditch.

After arriving and handing over thirty quid, it rapidly became apparent that the bike did not disassemble easily,* and there was no way the bloody thing would fit in the back of the X3.

It was therefore necessary to return home, hitch up the trailer, and drive back in to Redditch in order to collect the damned thing.

Now I love my wife dearly, but there are times when I just wish she would put in a little more thought, when we are executing on one of her impulses.

---

* I had the foresight to bring an extensive socket and driver set, and a large screwdriver

Problems with my helmet

Sunday was a fairly lazy day.

I pottered around the place and, on occasion, attempted to gather together my Germany trip essentials. I finally took the time to attend to my crash helmet,* as I am not happy with the fit, nor the installation of the intercom unit. 

For some strange reason, every time I put on the helmet I find that the pinna of my right ear gets folded over. This isn't particularly uncomfortable on a short ride, but on long journeys it niggles. I'm also not sure about the location of the intercom speakers, as, at high speeds, I can't hear a thing.

I had already made the decision to replace the helmet later on in the year, but, after faffing around with the lid for twenty minutes, I made the decision; there was no way I was going to put up with that ill fitting crash hat for the upcoming trip.

I therefore spent the next hour considering the fit and suitability of my other helmets.  The Shark Evoline 3 has a delaminated visor, is noisy and well overdue for replacement too. I finally looked at my Shark Explore-R. I had bought this on a whim a few years ago, and quickly decided that I wasn't overly keen on the plastic peak attached to this full face lid. As a result it had sat in the cupboard mostly unused. I wondered about the possibility of removing the peak and replacing the detachable goggles with the spare visor supplied.

After much faffing, and a narrowly avoided temper tantrum, I eventually worked out how the peak was removed.** Attaching the visor was a doddle, and I also found out that the helmet liner has pre-cut apertures for the intercom speakers ... Result!

And, as for the fit, it's lovely!

So, I did manage to achieve something today.

We also left Wilson home alone for the first time, as we popped over to help Bubbles celebrate his birthday. It was a fairly low key barbecue with a few friends, and we had a pleasant couple of hours.

A special mention does go to Jess. Have you ever met someone who had a massive impact on you  ... but not in a good way?  Jess was one of those people!

She is an ex-primary school teacher*** who has a complete inability to listen. She was constantly in transmit mode, and was only interested in patronising her audience with the benefit of her views and limited knowledge ... We've only owned standard poodles for fifteen years and, funnily enough, did not need to be told the origins of the breed and their elaborate clips!

And, as for Wilson ... we arrived home to find no dramas at all ... another result!

---

* Shark Vision-R

** A single thumb screw and brute force!

*** We have a saying "A teacher generally only knows slightly more than the age group they teach."

Germany is fast approaching

As the week drew to a close the weather forecast for Saturday had been suggesting that heavy rain was likely.  This was not welcome, as Bubbles had booked us in for a morning's clay shooting at the Cotswold Shooting Ground in Childswickham.

On rising I could see that we had experienced a few showers overnight, but the weather was reasonable. There was a cool breeze, but no rain, for the moment.

After my early morning chores, I threw my gun and shooting bag in the car, and headed across the Vale of Evesham for a fun morning's shooting. My score was dreadful, but I had a pleasant time catching up with Bubbles' and Ben's news.

And, even better than that, not a single drop of rain fell from the sky.

In the afternoon my first job was to remove the touring screen from the BMW, so that I could affix my Crit ' Air* sticker to the inside. I know that I should have done this on Thursday, when I originally fitted the screen, but I foolishly didn't.

Basically I am now in the process of slowly getting ready for the tour to Germany. I still haven't ridden my bike with the panniers fitted, but I am sure I will get to that before next Friday ... I bloody well hope it is still manageable.

So, as each day passes, an item or two is ticked off the virtual list and/or is added to the pile in the bedroom. 

As my holiday preparations continue I realised that my stock of bottled honey is running short, and I am hoping 30% will manage my little retail establishment** while I am away. I therefore spent a couple of hours liquifying and bottling the first batch from this year's honey harvest.

I now have twelve jars bottled, labelled, and ready for sale. That should be enough to keep her going.

---

* A French vehicle emissions certification that permits access to municipal clean air zones

** A tiny little roadside table, not even worthy of the term, "stall"

Today I 'ave been mostly ...

... Clipping The Rat.

Dog #4 has been looking very scruffy recently, and the fact that I have just clipped Whiffler and Hobson's faces have made her look rattier still.  With the weather likely to warm up, I really did need to get my shit together and give her a damned good haircut.

Now I have recounted the fact that The Rat does not like going to the groomers on several occasions, so I won't bore you again. I will simply advise that she is such a fidget that she just gets a 7FC* all over. Actually that's not strictly true, as I do clip her face with a #10 blade.**

So, today has been mostly spent clipping the dog. I took plenty of breaks to allow the blades to cool down, and for the cordless clippers to recharge.  These allowed The Rat to rest a little, and I also used several treats to keep her reasonably cooperative.

I can report that I now have a much skinnier looking dog.

That was my most significant achievement. I also finally removed the "no longer wet" supers from Hives #1 and #2.  These were reasonably clean, but had been left a little too long, andthe bees had started to store a little nectar in some of the frames. To get them totally honey free, I stacked them in the carport. Within a few minutes they had been located by scout bees, and were buzzing; with hundreds of bees busily cleaning them up.

---

* This will only mean something to someone who clips dogs. A 7FC blade is a #7 Finish Cut blade and it cuts the dog's coat to 3.2 mm in length.

** 1.5 mm

Post Script

I thought that The Rat's coat was looking a little overgrown. It was only when I checked that I realised she hadn't been clipped since last September.

That's gotta go!

At our first encounter with Wilson, we both noticed that he had a rather peculiar clip. 

He had a fairly short topknot which extended down the back of his neck. We both agreed that it made him look like he had a mullet.  Now neither of us are particularly stylish, but there is no way that any of our dogs is wandering around with the world's worst hairstyle.

As the title of today's post makes clear, it had to go!

After several days of nagging, I finally got out the clippers to remove the offending mullet.

I was aware that Wilson is used to being groomed, but I had no idea how he was going to respond to me sitting him down and attacking the back of his neck with my cordless Andis. It only took a couple of minutes to trim back his coat and I can report that he was quite happy to let me do it. 

Of course, a complete clip is a different matter, and I think I'd like to do that myself before we take him to the dog groomers. After all, I want to be certain of his temperament, before he is inflicted on an unsuspecting trainee.

I have already mention that I had been nagged politely requested to get rid of Wilson's mullet. This nagging request was multi layered, and I had also been instructed asked to trim Whiffler and Hobson's faces.  This was achieved without a fuss, but there was one more Herculean labour to be accomplished ... Dog #4 aka The Rat needed a complete clip!

I have previously documented the fact that The Rat does not like going to the groomers, so will not bore you again. She does not like being groomed, so today was not going to be fun! However the weather gods had smiled upon her, and she had earned a reprieve.

30% had foolishly taken the dogs out for an early morning walk and they had got quite wet. Now a quick face clip is no problem, but there was no way I could clip The Rat until she was completely dry.  We have discussed this at length, and it is the view of Ratty that she won't be fully dry "until the back end of July!"

Now the preceding paragraphs are usually sufficient for one day, but today turned out to be more productive than expected.

The bees were overdue for an inspection, but the weather would not oblige. It has either been sunny, but very windy or cool or showery. Neither of these are ideal conditions to open up a hive. But, after a wet start to the day, the weather finally cleared in the early afternoon and I managed to work my way through all three hives.

I can report that the young queen in Hive #3 was spotted, but there is still no sign of eggs or brood. I am reasonably confident that she has been mated, so, hopefully, she will start to lay in the next week.

I then moved on to Hive #2. This would be the first inspection since I took a shook swarm from it at the beginning of May.  After working my way through half a dozen frames in the brood box, I was delighted to see a frame of capped worker brood. The queen had hatched, mated, and returned to the colony. Clearly she was also laying well. As I continued my inspection I actually caught sight of her wandering across a frame. Satisfied that all was well, the hive was reassembled and the colony left to rebuild.

I finally checked the third hive. For the past few weeks I have found it challenging to locate the queen, and there has been very limited quantities of brood. Today's inspection yielded the same result. I located the queen and there was a couple of frames of brood, but, at this time of year, the brood box should contain six or seven frames rammed with brood.

I think I may have a failing queen. I am now faced with a dilemma; do I attempt to re-queen the colony, or do I leave them alone and hope that a natural supersedure will take place?* The fact that I will be away in Germany from next Friday makes re-queening challenging. On balance I think that I will leave the colony alone. I can always buy in a new queen when I get back, if there is no signs of supersedure.

Right, I'm almost finished! On the subject of the motorcycle tour to Germany, I have purchased a larger touring screen to make longer trips a little more comfortable. The screen arrived today, and eventually got fitted to the R1250R.**

I've finished now ... I promise!

---

* As has happened with Hive #3

** After a call to the retailer to got a copy of the correct fitting instructions.

Lazy Day

If it weren't for the fact that I affixed a UK sticker to the number plate of the R1250R,* I would have achieved absolutely nothing today.

Instead I did some more socialising, as we hosted a local art group this morning. 

The Dormston Doodlers are a delightful group of, mostly senior, ladies. The use their hobby of sketching as an excuse to get together, chat and eat cake. 

This morning our garden and orchard was their chosen venue and the weather Gods smiled upon them.  They dotted themselves at various locations around the garden, and, were soon making preliminary sketches.  Over the course of the morning these were developed in to some accomplished works. Their chosen mediums included pencil, pen and ink and watercolours.

I was particularly taken by the watercolour of Rose Cottage, and the pencil sketch of the huge Bramley apple tree up in the orchard.

They really were a lovely bunch of people and many of them have considerable talent ... both at doodling and also at making cakes!

So that was the morning. 

My afternoon was incredibly lazy, and was spent snoozing on the sofa. I blame the weather for this slothfulness. It had turned cool and blustery, making me put off the planned inspection of my hives.

I did make it to Tai Chi this evening and had a good session. Swotty Caroline only occasionally impeded my view of Kung Po Fran. I also made a slight adjustment to my assessment of Jane. She has been upgraded from "the woman who just doesn't listen" to the more succinct "moron". She achieved this promotion when she told us all that she had a smartphone, but was insistent that she did not want apps loaded on it!

Is it me? 

---

* A legal requirement for driving in France and Germany, apparently. 

Good Mates

The weather was cool, grey and wet this morning, and I was home alone.  30% had a very early appointment at the hospital in Kidderminster, so I was left in charge of the house and pets.

After checking out the weather, I made an executive decision and our normal exercise routine was cancelled; instead we had a literary morning, and I finally finished Terry Pratchett's Small Gods.*

Guilt then set in, and I headed to the kitchen, where I attempted to assuage these feelings by making the room look less like a blender explosion had just happened.

30% arrived home shortly before lunch and reported that all was well. She was very complimentary about the service received from the NHS, and we are both rapidly coming to the conclusion that parts of the NHS work brilliantly, and wonder why the rest is so appalling?

My afternoon was spent in the company of Grandad Jack.  We had attempted to link up with Judge Dread too, but he had bailed; claiming a leg injury or some such Southern Softy nonsense! Instead, Jack pitched up here and we spent a pleasant few hours drinking tea, talking nonsense, playing illness Top Trumps,** and taking a tour of the garden and sheds.

Jack left laden with eggs and honey. He later reported, via the medium of WhatsApp, that our eggs must have health giving qualities as he had managed to eat two of them for his breakfast. This is the first time that he has eaten this much since his treatment started.***

It was lovely to see Jack, who, for some strange reason, seems to enjoy coming over here, being leapt upon by the dogs and having the piss taken out him mercilessly by me.

We both agreed that we should do it more often.

---

* I know! I really do need to broaden my literary choices.

** Jack won, he has just been given the all clear after cancer treatment!

*** This is brilliant news as he is still having problems eating as a result of the radiotherapy treatment to his neck and throat

Finally, they're in the ground

For the past six weeks I have been religiously putting my brassica seedlings out in the garden, and then returning them to the shelter of the greenhouse overnight.

They have grown reasonably well, but I am not delighted with the young plants. I don't know whether it is the seed compost, the containers, or my watering regime, but they just aren't great.

Anyway, today I finally found the time to get them in to the ground. A row was marked out in the veg plot between two areas recently mulched with horse manure, and the plants were spaced at 18" intervals. The row is planted with a dozen savoy cabbages, and a couple of cauliflowers were added to complete the row.

I had another four small cauliflower plants, and these were planted in a mini row over by the French Beans. 

A keen gardener once told me that it was a waste of time growing cabbages, as the crop would be destroyed by pigeons and cabbage white butterflies. Now I love savoy cabbage, and I was not going to be put off by this negativity.  I purchased some metal hoops and insect netting, and I haven't looked back. Our cabbages have won first prize in the any other vegetable class at the local Horticultural Show.

As for this year's crop prospects, we'll just have to wait and see.

---

* BBQ Dave; he doesn't have a positive bone in his body!

The air show weekend

Saturday was most definitely a day of two halves.

The first half of the day was spent cleaning, tidying and preparing food for our planned get-together.  By three o'clock the house was reasonable presentable, and we even had time for a short snooze before our guests arrived.

We were joined by C&S and B&H in the late afternoon for the more relaxed half of the day. We settled in the garden to chat, drink and occasionally get the binoculars out to check out the aeroplanes from the airshow. 

I can report that the coffee cake was a great success, although we quickly moved on to alcoholic beverages and savoury nibbles, and by the end of the evening we had consumed a lot of wine!

B&H left late in the evening, and the rest of us eventually made our way to our beds around midnight.

It is fair to say that very little was achieved on Sunday.

We breakfasted out in the garden; demolishing home cured bacon sandwiches and eggs; collected from the coop that very same morning.

After copious amounts of tea and coffee, we managed to summon the energy to take a walk down the lane and out along the bridleway. C&S departed late in the morning, and we were left to have a very lazy day.

One thing worth mentioning about the weekend was that Wilson was absolutely amazing. He was a little noisy when our guests arrived, but settled down within minutes and was relaxed for the rest of the time.  The boy has only been with us a dozen days, but is rapidly fitting in with us and our little pack. He still has his moments, and can be a little possessive at times, but, overall, seems to have the makings of a lovely dog.

Coffee & Walnut Cake

With guests arriving tomorrow, I thought it might be a nice idea to bake a cake.

The Air Show weekend does tend to involve a fair degree of sitting in the garden, and refreshments are always welcome. I therefore decided to extend my baking repertoire and have a go at a coffee and walnut cake.

I used Nigella's recipe, and upscaled it to suit my two 9" baking tins. The ingredients and method are summarised here.

Ingredients

• 65 g walnut pieces
• 285 g caster sugar
• 285 g unsalted butter
• 255 g plain flour
• 5 tsp instant espresso coffee powder
• 3 and a bit tsp baking powder
• ¾ tsp bicarbonate of soda
• 5 large eggs
• 1 - 2 tbsp milk

and for the buttercream

• 440 g icing sugar
• 220 g softened butter
• 3½ tsp instant espresso coffee powder
• walnut halves to decorate

Method

1. Lightly butter two 9" baking tins and line with baking parchment
2. Pre heat the oven to 160℃ (fan)
3. Add the walnut pieces and caster sugar to a food processor and pulse it until is is a fine (ish) powder
4. Add the softened butter, flour, coffee, baking powder, bicarb and eggs, and blitz it until it forms a smooth batter.
5. While still mixing, gradually add some milk. The aim is to produce a soft dropping consistency.
6. The divide the batter between the two pans
7. Bake until the sponge springs back when pressed, or a skewer comes out clean. It took about 40 minutes for a 9" cake.
8. Once baked, leave the cake to cool in the tins for about ten minutes, before turning out on to a cooling rack.

Buttercream 

1. Pulse the icing sugar in the food processor to remove any lumps
2. Blend in the softened butter to produce the buttercream frosting
3. Dissolve the espresso powder in 1 tbsp of boiling water and, while mixing the buttercream, slowly introduce to the mixture; to produce a coffee flavoured filling and topping.

I'll let you know how it turns out tomorrow

The afternoon included a bit of hoeing in the veg patch and it's worth noting that it's not every day that a Lancaster bomber does a low level pass right over one's house. We also had a few strafing runs by the Red Arrows.

Cooking

 Activities took a culinary turn today.

It is the Midlands Air Show this weekend. It is centred on Ragley Hall, near Alcester in Warwickshire. This is conveniently only a couple of miles from us as the crow flies, or rather as the splendid display of aircraft and hot air balloons fly.

There is no forking out handfuls of cash for tickets and overpriced refreshments. Us cheapskates watch from our garden and do get a rather splendid view with all the comforts of home.

This weekend we will be joined by C&S, and B&H will be joining us for the first time at what is becoming an annual event.

This intro was a little long winded, but explains the reasons for my culinary activities. We have guests this weekend and it's only fair that I do my share of the cooking ... I also then stand a chance of doing less of the house cleaning that will definitely need to take place!

It had been agreed that we would be serving a honey roast ham this weekend; obviously basted with this year's honey harvest, and I was on the hook to prepare the it.

30% had purchased the gammon joint earlier in the week and, after the obligatory walk with the dogs, I put it on to simmer for three hours. While it was cooking, I headed in to Alcester and picked up a few essentials from the supermarket, including a disposable aluminium roasting tin.*

I started the afternoon by sticking cloves in to the ham, followed by a sprinkling of soft brown sugar, and a coat of this year's honey. After 40 minutes in the oven it was finished, and simply needed to cool, before being refrigerated.

That was pretty much for today. We did take another short walk with the dogs and I also adjusted the ingredients of Nigella Lawson's coffee cake recipe,** as I plan to extend my baking repertoire tomorrow.

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* The couple of quid price for one of these is well worth paying, to avoid having the clean the sticky mess that results from honey roasting a ham.

** From an 8" baking tin up to a 9" tin. Basically it's about a 25% increase

What flavour is your dog?

 Today I did close to bugger all.

In the morning I rinsed out the extractor and uncapping tray, and can finally declare that I have finished the clean up after Sunday's honey extraction.  The extractor was reassembled later in the day, and the store room is now accessible, once more.

I also finished repairing the super that I started yesterday. Basically there were two areas where the cedar sides had split, and small sections had broken away. One of these was large enough to allow ingress of bees, and this is not a good situation. Honey bees are not beyond robbing weaker hives of their stored honey, and a hole in a super would give them easy access to free food.

The repair wasn't particularly complicated. The damaged areas were cut away and routed to make regular, rectangular cutouts. I then fabricated an oak dutchman, and glued and screwed it in place to fill each of the holes. I'm rather pleased with this little repair job and it will be interesting to see how the super stands up in use.

As I said earlier, I did close to bugger all today, and the bulk of the afternoon was spent snoozing on the sofa. For some reason I felt absolutely shattered. Looking back, I suppose I have had quite a demanding few days in the preceding week.

I did also make it to Tai Chi this evening, but it was more an exercise in frustration than mindfulness ... Basically Swotty Caroline virtually glued herself to Kung Po Fran,* and it was very challenging to follow her lead for much of the session.

Finally, the recent arrival of Wilson got me thinking about the dogs in general. 

Wilson is described as a red Standard Poodle, but I think he would be better regarded as a dark apricot. Thinking about his coat colour led me to think of ways to describe him and I landed on "almost caramel" in colour.

This led me to bestow each of the dogs their own particular flavour. Wilson was, of course, salted caramel. Whiffler is a pale cream and is now definitely vermilla.** Hobson is a pale apricot colour, but he is, without doubt, banana. *** Finally we get to Dog #4 aka The Rat. Her flavour, without fear of contradiction and based on considerable evidence, is fox shit!

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* Our most excellent tutor

** It's how we say vanilla in this household

*** In the UK "nana" is an abbreviated form of banana, and is used as a gentle and affectionate rebuke for someone who is daft. Hobson is adorable, but can be an absolute fool at times.

A good day

The weather forecast for today was not pleasant reading. After a mediocre start, rain was expected to arrive by lunchtime and stick around for the rest of the afternoon.

This is far from perfect beekeeping weather, but my hives were due for an inspection.  At this time of year they need to be checked once a week. The inspections are for a variety of reasons including swarm control, disease, and, surprisingly at this time of year, starvation.

I have just taken a honey harvest, which has removed stored food from the hives. We are also about to enter a period in the British beekeeping year known as the June gap.  Basically June is surprisingly short on nectar bearing flowers. We have had the flush of fruit blossom and oilseed rape in the Spring, and now there is an interval before the Summer flowers make an appearance in July. It is, therefore, vital that the bees are checked to ensure they have sufficient food to keep them going.

I wandered up to the hives after breakfast and judged that they were sufficiently active to allow an inspection. I then headed back to the store room and gathered my equipment. This included some brood frames packed with stores, and the six supers that had been extracted on Sunday. 

The frames in these supers are still sticky with a film of honey that cannot be mechanically extracted. But the bees will collect every last sip, if the supers are placed atop the hives' crown boards ... this was my primary objective for today.

Hive #1 is currently my only hive with a laying queen. I quickly removed the two supers, noting that the lower one had a reasonable amount of stores. I then took a quick look through the brood box.  I didn't see the queen, but did spot a few larvae, so am reasonably happy that all is well. I also replaced a couple of empty brood frames with two filled with capped honey.

The hive was then reassembled with three wet supers on top of the crown board. These will be left on the hive for a few days and the bees will clean them up.

Hive #2 had a swarm cell when inspected on 6th May.  There is little point in carrying out an inspection for another week, or so. At that point I will be looking for signs that the queen has hatched, mated and started laying.  I am also aware that the colony's demand for food will have reduced, as there have been no fresh brood for three weeks, and the number of mature workers will have dropped too.  I did, however, give them three wet supers to clean up.

I was about to finish up when my eyes fell on hive #3, and I thought "Sod it, I'll have a look, it's probably not going to come to anything anyway."  This hive contained a shook swarm; taken from hive #2 on 6th May.  A subsequent inspection had shown that the queen had disappeared and a supersedure cell was found on one of the frames. The colony had then been left for nature to take its course.

I flicked through the frames, noting that there was plenty of food, but no sign of brood or eggs. As I reached the last couple of frames I spotted a very pretty queen wandering across the cells ... Fingers crossed that she will start laying in the next week or two.

The rest of the day was spent continuing the clean up of the extraction equipment and a repair to the woodwork of one of the supers.

I also had a call from the hospital regarding the results from my MRI scan.  The news is good. There is no sign of prostate cancer and no further tests are needed at this time. There will be a follow up appointment in six months time, and I will need to have a PSA test completed at that time.  If the PSA is normal I will be discharged.

This is obviously good news. I hadn't become overly worried in the past couple of weeks, and had just got on with my life.  There was little point in worrying when I hadn't even had a diagnosis.  I'll admit there were moments when I did think about a future that involved cancer treatment, but these were few, and I need to get on with other shit anyway.

The clean-up commences

It doesn't take a genius to work out that my priority for today was to clean up the sticky mess in the store room.

I rolled up my sleeves, got a bowl of hot soapy water and made a start. 

My approach was to deal with the easy items first. The honey buckets were stacked in a corned, and I then focused on the messy clutter of sieves, uncapping tools and so forth.

Over the course of the morning I made some progress and the extractor is now unbolted from its base and partially dismantled. It hasn't yet been cleaned, but I'm working myself up to that task.*

I dipped in an out of cleaning up over the course of the day. I know it needs to be done, but after the long day yesterday, the last thing I wanted was to be dealing with more sticky stuff.

Fortunately the afternoon had a welcome diversion, as 30% had invited Bubbles and Bobbyn over for coffee, a catch-up and to meet Wilson for the first time.

And that just about covers Bank Holiday Monday. I did manage to get the extractor frame and honey sieves in the dishwasher ... so they'll be nice a clean by tomorrow morning.

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* The extractor is about four feet in height and is approximately two feet in diameter. It is a large stainless steel drum on legs, with an electric motor unit to drive the central shaft. This shaft supports the cage that holds the honey frames. I am not blessed with long legs and I can only just reach the bottom of the drum when cleaning it. A few years ago I actually managed to crack a rib leaning over the edge to get it cleaned after extraction.

The Extraction

Sunday really did have an early start.

The honey supers needed to be removed from the two hives before the bees started flying. This meant that I was up there just after seven o'clock; loading the supers on to my wheel barrow.  They were quite a weight, which boded well for a good first harvest. There were also very few bees present. This indicated that my new clearer boards had worked too. I wheeled the supers down to the store room and stacked them, ready to be extracted.

It was then time for breakfast and a short walk down the lane with 30% and the dogs.

I was now at the point when I could put off the extraction no further. A bowl of hot soapy water and a towel were collected* and TP and I made start.

For the next few hours we worked our way through six honey filled supers. Each super contains ten frames of honey, each frame is double sided. That is sixty frames that needed to be uncapped before being loaded in to the centrifugal extractor.

I think I have already mentioned that the bees cap off each cell with wax once the stored nectar has been converted to honey.  These wax caps need to be removed. This is done with a knife that has a long serrated blade; very similar to a bread knife. 

This may sound straightforward, but the face of the combs can be quite uneven, and the frames can be heavy; making it a the most arduous, and tedious, part of the process.

Loading the frames in to the extractor, pressing the start button and operating the speed control are a piece of cake by comparison.

By the end of the day we had about 120 lbs of honey; filtered and stored in plastic honey buckets.

I was pleased, but every piece of extraction equipment is covered with wax and honey. I now have a monumental clean up to "look forward to" in the coming days!

Now that should have been all of the new today, but I also noticed that my carrots have made an appearance in the raised bed.  These were planted on two weeks ago, and I was concerned about the viability of the seed, but it seems that there was no need to be worried ... they are coming up like weeds! 

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* This is the most vital piece of equipment. Honey extraction is very messy, and I cannot overstate how much of a pleasure it is to, briefly, have clean hands.

The Toms are in

The new relatively* early morning routine is that we all take a short walk down the lane with the dogs.  We tend to cover a mile, or so. The aim is for the dogs to be emptied, and for the new boy to become familiar with us, his new pack and his new surroundings.

He is making good progress and can now be walked off the lead.  His recall seems to be pretty good, and he is unperturbed by horses, traffic and other dog walkers.

However we were a little concerned by his behaviour later in the morning, when TP turned up for a weekend visit.  The new boy, Wilson became quite agitated and very noisy.  He soon calmed, once TP sat down and gave him a stroke, but the behaviour was repeated each time Wilson encountered TP afresh. 

Matters improved slightly over the course of the day, but he was clearly not as comfortable with TP as he is with me and 30%.*** We can only assume that it is a response to a new person in his new territory, and that he is being somewhat protective ... Let's hope he calms over time.

Right, that's the dog news update, now on to the garden.

I got my tomatoes planted in the greenhouse, and mowed the lawns at the front of the cottage.  The garden now looks reasonably presentable, but I do have to say that my tomato plants look very small considering that it is almost June.

TP and I then took a walk around the Three Miler with Wilson, Hobson and The Rat.  This was the first time Wilson had completed this loop and he performed really well.  He did pull a little on his lead through the village, and he seemed to recognise when we were close to home; pulling to the limit of his extending lead.

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* 30% is not an early riser. She says she is and will present some waffly narrative about rising at the crack of sparrows to let the dog out for a pee. The problem with this tale is that it will not include the fact that she then returns to her bed and has a lie in until seven thirty** at the earliest!

** Eight o'clock is her more usual time of rising.

*** Apparently he shared his last home with his owner's brother; a young man with alleged anger issues.  It may be that he is wary of younger men.

Honey harvest preparations

Friday turned out to be another busy day.

After an early morning walk down the lane to empty the dogs, we loaded Hobson and his brother in to the car and headed over the Cheltenham. 

I wandered in to the Motorrad showroom and was promptly relived of a couple of hundred quid. My bike was brought from the wash bay, and I was soon heading back down the M5 towards home.

I then turned my attention towards the upcoming honey harvest, and got the extractor assembled. Then it was a case of preparing the hives.

I planned to take three supers from each of Hives #1 and #2.  Obviously honey extraction is a whole lot easier if the supers are free from bees, so the hives need to be configured to get the bees to move out of them.  The hives were given a few puffs of smoke to calm the bees, and then the three supers were taken off the hive. An empty super was added to hive to give the bees space to move in to. I then added one of my newly constructed clearer boards and replaced the three honey filled supers.

All being well, the bees will move out of the supers overnight and be prevented from returning by the clearer boards ... fingers crossed!

The rest of the day was taken up with watering the veg patch and mowing the lawns at the back of the cottage.

Apparently the forecast for the Bank Holiday weekend is not great, so I wanted to get the lawns trimmed before they got out of hand.

Today was, shall we say, unusual!

 Today can be summed up very concisely.

I got up and got busy. Then I got clean, after which I got stoned. I then got scanned and, after that, I mostly slept.

I you'd like a little more detail here we go.

The "getting up and getting busy" was because I needed to ride the R1250R over to the Motorrad Dealership in Cheltenham for its first service. 30% followed in her car,* so she could give me lift back.

The "getting clean" bit really doesn't need elaboration, but I should clarify the bit about getting stoned.

I am a claustrophobe. I really do not like being constrained in restricted spaces. Shit, I don't even like wearing polo neck jumpers! 

I have an MRI scan scheduled for this afternoon, and, on previous occasions, I have panicked, hit the alarm button and started to crawl out of the damned things, midway through the scan. I really am quite claustrophobic.

In order to reduce the "get me the fuck out of here" urges, I have previously consulted my General Practitioner and been prescribed Lorazepam.  These little pills do work a treat, and I have been known to actually sleep during previous MRI scans.

The downside is that I talk rubbish, see double, claim to be a most excellent driver and have a tendency to fall asleep at the drop of a hat.

So, having dropped off the bike, I showered and, at around eleven o'clock, I treated myself to a coffee and the prescribed medication. Within half an hour I was a little unsteady on my feet and very calm.

Mummy Sheila picked me up just before one o'clock to give me a lift to the hospital and I was definitely very chilled by then.

The scan went well. I didn't panic and, if I am honest, I was half asleep for the entire process.  I kept my eyes shut tight most of the time. I did open them on one occasion, and a mild sense of alarm started to bubble up in my addled brain by the proximity of the scanner tube. 

Anyway, I got through it, got home and was sent straight to bed by 30%. I woke around six o'clock in the evening and was so confused, that I briefly thought it was the following morning.  

It is fair to say that the rest of the evening was spent semi-conscious on the sofa.

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* With Hobson and his brother coming along for a little ride out

A quiet day, with preparations underway

 Wednesday was another quiet day spent mostly in the garden.

Our canine guest has been doing well, and is slowly integrating in to our pack.  He can be, shall we say, a little over possessive when it comes to his toys, and we have adopted a confiscation tactic to calm things down.  Overall he seems to be settling well. 

We took him for a short walk down the lane with the other three this morning and he behaved well.  He will walk to heel on a lead, but he really enjoyed walking on a longer lead, and checking out the scents in the verges.* 

We also took him for a short run in the car, as he will be having a ride out tomorrow. Again, he behaved perfectly and simply settled and snoozed.

Now moving on to the bees.

I inspected my one queen right hive yesterday and spotted the queen for the first time in three weeks ... phew.  The colony seems to be doing well and there are three supers crammed with honey, and ready for extraction.  

I plan to harvest the honey over the coming weekend and will also be removing another three supers from Hive #2. I haven't bothered inspecting this hive, as, if all has gone to plan, it has a young queen in the process of maturing, mating and taking on her regal role at the heart of the colony. There is little point in intervening in this process, so I'm leaving well alone.

The rest of my day was spent in preparing the store room for honey extraction. My honey extractor was dismantled and the interior was given a damned good scrub. It was cleaned after I last used it, but it needs to be spotless for the production of foodstuffs.

I did the same with the uncapping tray,** and then arranged the various stands and tools to create a compact, and hopefully efficient workspace. My honey sieves have been put through the dishwasher and we just need to get the honey storage buckets clean, before we're ready to go.***

The thought that my profit margin will soar when I'm selling my own honey has not escaped me!

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* and adding his own to the mix!

** The honeybees seal each cell of honey with a capping of wax. These caps need to be cut away before the frames are inserted in to the centrifugal extractor. Uncapping can be quite a messy job and an uncapping tray is a worthwhile investment to make honey harvesting a little easier.

*** That is not strictly true. I need to get spare supers and clearer boards added to the hives, and leave them for a day or two. I then need to remove the filled supers, which will, hopefully, be bee free.  THEN I will be ready to start the extraction. DO NOT get me started on the faffing around once the honey is out of the frames! The clean up is a mission in its own right.