Today I needed to get myself in to the nearest circle of hell for my appraisal meeting with IM. Instead of spending a full day in an office environment, that is not very conducive to completion of training courses, I spent the morning at home and took T&M out for a walk. There had been a hard frost overnight and stretches of the Three Miler were covered in sheet ice as a result of the near constant run-off from the fields. As I picked my way along the slippery lanes warnings were exchanged with the few people I met and I took care in the worst areas. Even the dogs went skittering across the road in a few places and tended to charge along the verges where the grip was better. As I passed the half way point and headed back in to the village I suddenly lost my footing and went from vertical to horizontal in the blink of an eye. One minute I was walking along the road, the next I was flat on my back, looking skyward. I hauled myself upright and there was no damage done although I contemplated the fact that I could have easily cracked my skull in many of the alternate universes I might inhabit.*
Back at home I got my act together, tidied myself up and headed in to the Office. The appraisal meeting was of the traditional format; how was 2012 for you? what went well? what didn't go well? what do you plan to do as you move in 2013? blah, blah, blah. I think when you have sat in a few of these you get a little bored with the foreplay and really are only interested in the money shot. It might seem strange to use sex as a metaphor for an appraisal meeting but fundamentally that is what it is ...
... a series of manoeuvrings to get both parties in the right frame of mind and then the delivery of the assessment which will hopefully leave both parties satisfied - in that one will get slightly less than what they want** and the other didn't get berated or physically abused for getting it totally wrong.
Everyone goes into these meetings with an expectation of their appraisal score. These expectations can range from delusional to overly cynical. I must admit that, after working for Dante's for more than twelve years, I tend to
... from my perspective the year had been reasonable. I had had successes rather than wins, had managed to justify a promotion and hadn't fucked anything up. Fundamentally, I thought that I had done alright and might get a slightly better than average score. I was therefore lost for words when IM delivered his final score.
Looks like I might get another pay rise this year.
---* most of these are very similar to this one although in some of the more peculiar ones 30% is a lot calmer and Marauder can talk!
** but enough that they don't make a complete fuss