C is for Canon ...

... yes and c is for c**ts too but I'm going to do my damnedest to get this down in chronological order so I'll get to that multinational in a few paragraphs ...

... The day started early with a quick run up to The Defender Centre which sits in Banjo Country between Bromsgrove and Stourbridge. My initial reception was definitely one of disinterest until the Mechanic released that their absent salesman had not invited along a customer who wanted a sows ear turned in to a silk purse. Once they had take a look at the car and the wish list they realised it was all doable and turned positively enthusiastic about the job and a few other odds and ends that would really tidy up the appearance of the car.

At this point I'll just get back to the Defender Centre Salesman for a couple of observations. I had arranged to see him on Friday morning and so was somewhat surprised to have to talk to him via a mechanic's mobile because he was at home "watching an auction" and wouldn't be in for about half an hour. Now I have an expectation of a car salesman. I expect them to be unreliable, and he had definitely ticked that box, I also expect them to be creative in their Bullshit and I think he had totally failed by telling me the obvious truth here. The stupid bugger was  sat at home with his trousers round his ankles looking at porn on the Internet whilst he waited to place a bid on an eBay auction during the final 40 seconds.

Anyway, moving on, they agreed to work up a quote and I left to get back to my working day. At home sat in front of the laptop I heard T&M announce the arrival of the Postman. I wandered out to pick up the post and spied a letter addressed to me. I opened it to find a letter that appeared to indicate that Canon want me to pay for the repairs of my camera despite a) being under a US warranty and b) having offered to undertake reasonable repairs on a goodwill basis. The letter was a standard quotation with no reference to my complaint or any previous communications so I phoned them for clarification...

... it transpires that they will not repair my camera on a good will basis and their previously undefined reasonable costs now seems to vary between £30 and £50 depending on which Customer Service Manager I spoke to. At present the repair quote sits at £170 and I pointed out that £72 of that was an inspection cost i.e. a Service that they had already agreed to undertake free of charge and a further £9 was to clean a lens that was less than 9 months old. I pointed out that approximately 50% of their quote was for stuff I either didn't need or stuff they had already agreed to do free of charge. In other words it was, and their is now other way of stating this, artificially inflated.

The current situation is that they have agreed to revise the quote, I will then pay for the work and then claim the costs back from Canon US. I may go with this plan or alternatively I may go to their Director as, after three requests, they agreed to provide his name and address. At this point I think it fair to say that the customer service offered by Canon is absolutely fucking appalling as  they have reneged on their promise and provided an artificially inflated quote in an attempt to support their position. They are fucking charlatans.

Having finished my rant at Canon I then decided to chase up the location of my Land Rover Seat covers so I phoned the Second Hand Car Dealer in Coventry that had sold them to me. I asked for "John" as that was the name on the e-mail advising that they had been "lost". I was told, in a somewhat suspicious tone, that there was no-one called John there. At this point I changed tack and advised that I was calling about the Land Rover Seat covers. The chap also changed tack, went in to full on sales mode and started telling me what a fantastic set they were and that I could have them for £150. I let him ramble on for a while before advising that I had won them in an eBay auction for £25, had already paid for them and had now been told they were "lost"...

... There was a tumbleweed moment whilst the Salesman shifted a few mental gears before advising that a) some mistake had been made and b) I could not have them for £25. We both knew that the covers, if they were as described, were a steal at £150 so I really didn't want to upset the apple cart and end up with a refund so I let things play out. The chap was a true salesman and told me I could have them for £100. After a bit of tooing and froing we agreed on £80 and I climbed in to the car to pick them up before he changed his mind.

Once home I examined the goods and I think it fair to say that I have a very good deal. Lord knows how this chap came across these covers but there are three front seat covers and eight rear seat covers. They are all in "as new" condition and the only issue is that some of the seams have been cut where they were removed from the original vehicle. As a consequence I will need the services of a Car Trimmer but there is one just down the road who has quoted £150 to fit them.

So today has been one of ups and downs. I am really very cross with Canon and really very pleased with the seat cover deal. I suppose on balance things are heading in the right direction.

Oh, and I did some work too.