After a final whizz around at home, clothes and groceries* were stuffed in to bags and piled up in the hall. The dogs were loaded in to the car and we headed over to Redditch and dropped them off with Kate; the dog sitter.
We then headed back home, reloaded the car with our holiday trappings and headed over to Worcester to collect B&H. We soon had their stuff loaded in to the boot,** and were heading up the M5 towards Stoke-on-Trent.
We arrived shortly after midday and lunched in a pub overlooking the Marina, before checking in and collecting the boat; Ellie.
The boat demonstration was kept to a minimum as I have had a fair bit of experience handling narrow boats over the years.*** I asked out demonstrator; Steve about a suitable route for our four night trip and he suggested that we might try the Caldon Canal. He warned that it might be a little shallow in places and also suggested that we cruise as far as Bridge 18 before mooring for the night ... this would ensure we had left some of the less salubrious areas of Stoke behind.
Midway through the afternoon we set off from the Marina and within four hundred yards we left the Trent & Mersey Canal and joined the Caldon Canal.
All seemed to be going well, although I noted that the canal did seem to be quite narrow and winding. We assumed that things would be less meandering as we left the city behind. Our first few hours of cruising included a pair of staircase locks and the excitement of operating a lift bridge that dropped barriers across the road and halted traffic while we passed by. When Steve described this it sounded quite complicated and seemed like we would be halting traffic on a major A road. It was, in fact, a quiet road on an industrial estate and quite simple to operate. We did enjoy the momentary power of stopping cars while we chugged past the lift bridge at two miles per hour.
The evening included a couple of drinks at The Foxley Hotel, where a couple of local lads**** suggested that we try the Milton Chippy for our evening meal.
B and I headed up to the chippy and were received like long lost family. After a very friendly reception we wandered back to the boat and stuffed ourselves with fish and chips.
Here endeth the first entry in the log of the vessel Ellie and her foolhardy crew.
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* There was a lot of booze!
** There was a lot more booze!
*** I used to be a boat handler/demonstrator for Cleaver Marine a their Evesham base when I was in my late teens. We also used to own a 58' narrow boat for a few years from 2004. This was moored on the River Soar and was used for mid-week access visits when TP still lived with his mum. Then there have also been the occasional holidays on boats over the years too.
**** Estate Agent Ollie deserves a special mention as, at the age of 22, he already has a signature car crash which seems to climax with an expensive high powered saloon car ending up on its roof ... we don't think he will make old bones!
16th April, Day 2: Milton to Lock 16, Oakmeadowford Lock
On Wednesday we left Stoke behind and started to pass through the Staffordshire countryside. It was quite beautiful, although the weather wasn't playing ball. The morning was very wet, with a cold wind, and there was one point where B & I moored up and came in to the cabin to thaw out.
The rain eventually slowed and we continued cruising under cold leaden skies.
Yesterday we noted how the Stoke stretches of the Caldon Canal seemed quite narrow and twisty. I can confirm that the navigation did not improve and there were many sections of the cut where two boats couldn't pass.* We also noted that many of the bridges and locks were on tight bends making for some challenging manoeuvring** to get the boat through with minimal scraping.
We also noted some rather poor etiquette from some of the private boats. This included mooring on tight turns and constricted sections, and also some very aggressive shouting from a chap who felt that we were passing his boat at too high a speed. Ellie's engine was barely above tick over at the time. We did point this out and were rewarded with a threat of a hospital visit by Mr Angry.
Over the course of the day B & I created a whole back story for Mr Angry which involved a late night of internet porn and the fact that he was the last King of the Caldon Canal. He has a trident of power, wears a crown of duckweed and has two Canada Geese as guards ... Basically the man was a complete bell end.
We continued cruising through the fine countryside and moored just before the Oakmeadowford lock.
Our evening was spent attempting to reduce the amount of alcohol that we had brought with us ... we did quite well on this task.
Here endeth the second log entry of the vessel Ellie and her exploration of the wilds of Staffordshire. Note that some of the natives are hostile.
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* Remember a narrow boat is only 6' 10" wide
** A narrow boat can be reversed, but it goes where it bloody well likes ... they have no steering going backwards.
17th April, Day 3: Lock 16 on to the Froghall tunnel and back to Denford
Thursday was as fine as yesterday was horrible. The morning was warm and sunny, and we were on our way shortly after eight this morning. Within a couple of minutes we had rounded yet another bend and passed through lock 16 on to the River Churnet.
The plan was to cruise on and moor in the vicinity of the Froghall tunnel. We had been alerted to the presence of Hetty's Tea Shop and it was suggested as a splendid place to have breakfast.
It was a lovely run on to Froghall and we arrived a little after ten o'clock. We were lucky to see another narrow boat turning on the only winding hole* large enough to accommodate Ellie.** I say "lucky" as there was no signage to indicate that it was a winding hole. It was actually little more than a v shaped indentation of the canal in to the hillside and not very obvious.
At this point I have to say that the canal gods were on my side and I absolutely smashed getting Ellie turned around and facing back towards Stoke. We then moved her clear of the winding hole and moored her alongside the tow path.
It was then a short walk in the sunshine to Hetty's Tea Room. There we chose a table in the morning sun and breakfasted on splendid breakfast baps. Further supplies*** were taken on board and we took a moment to appreciate that we had reached the furthest point on this monumental journey of exploration.
We had completed seventeen miles and passed through seventeen locks. We had endured wind chill of -2 ℃, passed more Canada Geese than they actually have in Canada and also managed to enrage the King of the Caldon Canal.
I think it fair to say that there is the making of one hell of a sea shanty about this voyage ... or at least a half decent folk song!
Our return journey continued in the fine sunshine and we moored for the being just past the Hazlehurst Aqueduct in Denford. This evening the crew revolted**** and refused to enter the galley. As a result we dined at a lovely little pub called the Hollybush Inn.
Here endeth the third log entry of the narrowboat Ellie.
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* A point in the canal network where the navigation broadens to allow a boat to be turned around. You will be a familiar with a three point turn in a car. It can easily be a seven or nine point turn in a narrow boat ... with no steering in reverse and very little spare room to manoeuvre!
** Ellie is sixty two feet in length
*** A slice of coffee and walnut cake and three blueberry and lemon scones, with jam and clotted cream. Note: It is important to keep an accurate record of the ship's inventory.
**** B&I had already established that the crew are revolting!
18th April, Day 4: Denford back to Stoke
Friday's weather forecast did not look good, so B&I donned oilskins and sou'westers and bravely endured a fine drizzle on the rear deck.
The plan for today was to return to Ellie's home mooring in Stoke by nightfall, so we were ready to leave bright and early on Saturday.
At this point I should mention that B&I decided that Ellie should be renamed the Lady Margaret Thatcher.* Over the past few days we had noticed that there were moments when she just refused to turn. After a process of elimination and checks we realised that it was when she encountered the shallower stretches of the canal.
The shallow water was still sufficiently deep to allow her to cruise, but created enough drag that she would be very reluctant to respond to movements of the tiller. There were a number of occasions when we needed to thrust her in to reverse to avoid bumping the bank and to have another attempt at a turn.
There were also a couple of points when she did run aground and needed to be pushed in to the middle of the cut using the pole.
Back to our homeward leg. The trip from Denford back to Stoke was a little under ten miles and we eventually moored up a little after six in the evening. We did feel the need to stop once more in the fine hamlet of Milton and sample the grog** at the Millrace Inn.
We gathered our thoughts on our journey of exploration and B commented that if he had attempted to navigate the Caldon canal with just support from H, as a first solo outing, he would never step aboard another narrowboat ever!***
I will say that it is definitely the most challenging section of canal I have ever travelled.
With that thought I will end the fourth log entry of the narrowboat The Lady Margaret Thatcher.
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* For any reader under the age of fifty, Thatcher was famous for her "This Lady's not for turning" quote.
** For medicinal purposes and to keep out the chill.
*** B loves messing around in boats and really fancies holidaying with H on a narrowboat. The past couple of trips have allowed him to get some experience and develop his boat handling skills. We now jokingly assess his skill level as Barely Adequate, or possible Remedial.
19th April, Day 5: Stoke back to Worcestershire
We were up early and soon had our kit packed and piled in the back of the car. An all you can eat breakfast was consumed at the nearby Toby Inn before returning to the hire company and completing the checking out procedures. As we chatted to the Reception staff we started to explore the canal holiday options available to us and the Llangollen canal seems to be a possibility.
We Also chatted to Steve about the challenges of navigating the Caldon Canal and he commented that "if you can do the Caldon Canal, you can do any of them!" ... Cheers Steve! It would have been nice if you had told us that it was a little tricky before sending us off.
I am a reasonably experienced boat handler and, whilst I did really enjoy the trip, There were very few moments when one could relax and chill. You needed to be focused and concentrating for much of the trip.
The car journey back home was uneventful, and, after unloading, we headed over to Redditch to pick up the dogs.
We then had a very lazy afternoon which included a lengthy kip.
Here endeth the final log entry of the narrowboat Ellie.
Post Script
Next year's trip may well be to the Llangollen canal ... everyone seems very keen.