Saturday 26 February 2011

The Wanderer Returns

TP has returned from his Austrian tour intact with tales of his skiing expertise. He has had a fantastic time and took to skiing like the proverbial duck to water. He has never skied before but was moved up a class after the first 10 minutes when he had already mastered the snow plough and basic turns.

It seems that he has progressed incredibly well and quickly caught up with his friends that had previous skiing experience. He must have been pretty handy as he showed us a video he had shot whilst skiing a red run - pretty impressive for only a few days of practice.

He arrived home yesterday afternoon absolutely shattered after a 20 hour coach Journey and has spent much of his time sleeping since. He was alert enough to notice that he was now sleeping in his new bedroom and that 30% and I had installed a new wardrobe and supplied some very funky bed linen to go with his chosen colour scheme of Taxi Yellow and Orange.

His skiing exploits have prompted 30% to consider a winter holiday next year and I was surprisingly asked for my views on a Winter holiday.....

.... I agreed that the Seychelles or the Maldives would be nice in February 2012. Ouch! Apparently that was not what 30% meant.

Today the plan was to take T&M for an early walk, pop in to Tesco and then have lunch at a local pub. This would leave the afternoon free for an hour or so of work in front of the Rugby  followed by a kip and then over to Warwick Arts Centre to see Andy Parsons do a stand-up set this evening.

This is all running to schedule but I would like to make one announcement to the absolute cock that gesticulated aggressively at 30% and me while we were taking T&M for a walk. This Bell End* saw Marauder crouch to do her business and then we walked on. The blind git assumed that she had taken a dump and that we were ignorant dog owners that were just going to leave it there. In response, I do clear up my dog's shit but if he had been slightly more observant he would have noticed that a) Marauder is a Bitch and b) she was taking a pee.
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* aka the pretentious old prat who puts on a shonky Scots accent to address the haggis on Burns Night. I may take the opportunity to correct him when I next see him.

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