Sometimes I wonder about my son

Today TP and I were in the kitchen and he was grazing. After checking the fruit bowl for grapes, he scanned the shelves for cashews or pistachios before selecting a storage jar of shelled peanuts.

"Dad, what sort of nuts are these?" he asked. I pointed out that these were the nuts 30% put out for the birds and he looked at me with an expression that suggested he thought I was taking the piss.*

He opened the jar and tipped a few nuts in to his hand and laughed as I repeated that he was about to eat bird food. I called to 30%, who was in the lounge, and it was only when her dulcet tones** reached us and confirmed my statement that TP returned the peanuts to the jar.

Apparently he has been snacking on them for the past few days and a blackbirds, three starlings and a robin are preparing their case for retributions.

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* I do so frequently … I see it as preparation for when I release him back in to the wild.
** Think fishwife!