Friday, 6 August 2010
Thursday, 5 August 2010
Birthday Present.
Today is my Dad's Birthday.
If he was a dog he be about 11 years old.
A few weeks back I mentioned that he has decided to have another dog after 15 or more years without one and so this is his Birthday present. He adores Tyson, but she is way too energetic for an elderly Gentleman so it is fortunate that her breed comes in a smaller variety and this is what he has chosen.
I have this afternoon off work and we will be traveling up in to South Staffordshire to pick up the Pup. Yet another coincidence that Tyson & Marauder's joint alias is the "Straining Staffies" and that is where the new pup originates.
On the Home Front the Buff Brahma Cock is now in the fridge. I hope that keeps the Neighbour happy.
It is unfortunate that 30% had become a little attached to him but at least her feelings are eased by the fact that he had a good and long life before he was prepped for dinner. I'm not sure how common knowledge it is but most commercial poultry is killed at around 6 to 7 weeks old*. Free Range Birds are slightly older but rarely more than 12 weeks. Have you ever looked at a Free Range Bird in the Supermarket and gasped when they are asking £9 to £11 for a bird - that is the price of those extra weeks and a field to run round in.
The Buff Lad was about a year old and is probably a bit tough for a roast so I have jointed him and he will make a great casserole, as did the Light Sussex earlier in the week.
On the work front, I finish today and am likely to be off for the best part of a month. I have a minor operation on my hand tomorrow and am then likely to be signed off for a couple of weeks while it heals and am then away for the Family Holiday at the back end of August before starting in a new role at Dante's.
To quote John "Hannibal" Smith; "I love it when a plan comes together"
** this is the reason I like to rear at least some of the chicken we eat at home
If he was a dog he be about 11 years old.
A few weeks back I mentioned that he has decided to have another dog after 15 or more years without one and so this is his Birthday present. He adores Tyson, but she is way too energetic for an elderly Gentleman so it is fortunate that her breed comes in a smaller variety and this is what he has chosen.
I have this afternoon off work and we will be traveling up in to South Staffordshire to pick up the Pup. Yet another coincidence that Tyson & Marauder's joint alias is the "Straining Staffies" and that is where the new pup originates.
On the Home Front the Buff Brahma Cock is now in the fridge. I hope that keeps the Neighbour happy.
It is unfortunate that 30% had become a little attached to him but at least her feelings are eased by the fact that he had a good and long life before he was prepped for dinner. I'm not sure how common knowledge it is but most commercial poultry is killed at around 6 to 7 weeks old*. Free Range Birds are slightly older but rarely more than 12 weeks. Have you ever looked at a Free Range Bird in the Supermarket and gasped when they are asking £9 to £11 for a bird - that is the price of those extra weeks and a field to run round in.
The Buff Lad was about a year old and is probably a bit tough for a roast so I have jointed him and he will make a great casserole, as did the Light Sussex earlier in the week.
On the work front, I finish today and am likely to be off for the best part of a month. I have a minor operation on my hand tomorrow and am then likely to be signed off for a couple of weeks while it heals and am then away for the Family Holiday at the back end of August before starting in a new role at Dante's.
To quote John "Hannibal" Smith; "I love it when a plan comes together"
---------------------------------------------------
* at this age they still cheep rather than cluck and still have baby blue eyes**** this is the reason I like to rear at least some of the chicken we eat at home
Wednesday, 4 August 2010
Yesterday's News
Things at work are slowing down as I complete the hand over of my current workload to a colleague.
This meant that I was able to take a lunch break and nip in to town to the auto-bank. Not particularly newsworthy, I'll admit, but on this occasion a lack of time pressures meant that I could take the dust sheet off the Vespa and take a slightly more extended route than is normal. It is somewhat frustrating that I have only just got her back to a roadworthy and road legal state and am about to have a hand operation that is likely to keep me off her for a good few weeks while it heals.
Moving on, Tuesday evening is dog training night. TP is off for a few days with his Mum so 30% stood in as Marauder's Handler and off we went to class....
... what a disaster that was! The normal trainer was off having had an operation on her foot and a replacement had been found - Trainer. not foot - talk about chalk and cheese! It was a nightmare - the key to dog training is consistency and repetition - this woman was contradictory, very poor at describing what she wanted from the class and unwilling to go with the approach that the normal trainer has. As a consequence I was confused so God only knows what Tyson and Marauder thought of it all.
It wasn't just me either. 30% had to bite her tongue on a couple of occasions and we saw a few "looks" from other members too. After the class we tend to take the dogs for a quick run round the park in case they need a pee before the drive home. This gave us the opportunity for a bitching session with a few other members and in true team spirit we decided that the new trainer was piss poor and it was a good job Brenda is only off for a couple of weeks.
A few of us decided to throw a "sicky" next week and return to classes once Brenda is fit and able. That might seem a bit extreme but I learned how much I enjoy dog training and how much of that enjoyment was dissipated by a replacement trainer who seemed to think that the current approach is incorrect and needs a new strategy.
That is all well and good so long as you win Hearts and Minds and can take the Group along to this Brave New World. Unfortunately that was the flaw with her plan. There was nothing wrong with the old approach and if it ain't broke don't fix it - especially if you are only standing in for a couple of weeks.
This meant that I was able to take a lunch break and nip in to town to the auto-bank. Not particularly newsworthy, I'll admit, but on this occasion a lack of time pressures meant that I could take the dust sheet off the Vespa and take a slightly more extended route than is normal. It is somewhat frustrating that I have only just got her back to a roadworthy and road legal state and am about to have a hand operation that is likely to keep me off her for a good few weeks while it heals.
Moving on, Tuesday evening is dog training night. TP is off for a few days with his Mum so 30% stood in as Marauder's Handler and off we went to class....
... what a disaster that was! The normal trainer was off having had an operation on her foot and a replacement had been found - Trainer. not foot - talk about chalk and cheese! It was a nightmare - the key to dog training is consistency and repetition - this woman was contradictory, very poor at describing what she wanted from the class and unwilling to go with the approach that the normal trainer has. As a consequence I was confused so God only knows what Tyson and Marauder thought of it all.
It wasn't just me either. 30% had to bite her tongue on a couple of occasions and we saw a few "looks" from other members too. After the class we tend to take the dogs for a quick run round the park in case they need a pee before the drive home. This gave us the opportunity for a bitching session with a few other members and in true team spirit we decided that the new trainer was piss poor and it was a good job Brenda is only off for a couple of weeks.
A few of us decided to throw a "sicky" next week and return to classes once Brenda is fit and able. That might seem a bit extreme but I learned how much I enjoy dog training and how much of that enjoyment was dissipated by a replacement trainer who seemed to think that the current approach is incorrect and needs a new strategy.
That is all well and good so long as you win Hearts and Minds and can take the Group along to this Brave New World. Unfortunately that was the flaw with her plan. There was nothing wrong with the old approach and if it ain't broke don't fix it - especially if you are only standing in for a couple of weeks.
Tuesday, 3 August 2010
Getting Up
At the moment TP is enjoying those long, school, summer holidays ..... and so am I. As he doesn't need to be persuaded from his pit at 7 a.m. neither do I. Like many of my colleagues I am able to work from home and it is nice to be able to get out of bed without the need to set an Alarm Clock, perform minor ablutions and still be ready for work on time.
30% is generally Office based so still needs to set the alarm which gives me even greater pleasure because I can then ignore the damn thing and doze for 40 minutes or so ...... "What about the chickens?" I hear you ask, "Sod them - they can have a lie in too" is my pithy response. Actually there is further bad news on the chicken front but more of that in a minute.
Going back to 30%, she needs to set the alarm to get ready for the Office but also seems to think that, because I can have a lie in, so can she. She then has to run round like a mad thing shouting in order to get out of the door and leave for work. Why she has to shout I'm not quite sure - it's just one of those things she does.
Right, back to the Poultry If your an urban dweller or of a sensitive nature you might want to go and Google something else because it might get a bit "rocky" from here on in.
First things first, Endemol's death on Saturday was very timely as we have received a notice from the Council about the noise of the Cocks. I don't have a problem with that. The notice is very polite and is just that, it is a notice that they have received a complaint and are obliged to investigate.
We have always been sensitive about the noise of the Cocks and their potential impact on our neighbours and have always made it clear to them that if they are disturbed we will do something about it. That is why I am a little peeved to have had a letter from the Council. Rather than knock on the door and say "Badman - they are getting a bit noisy, can you sort them out" some idiot has got themselves all worked up about the noise and gone to the council rather than just sort it out.
This is where I start my "Towny" rant. I am from a rural background and ringing the council is not the way to do things, just come round and knock on the door and ask! Endemol's death was perfect timing and yesterday saw the Light Sussex have it's neck pulled and it is now sitting in the slow cooker surrounded by vegetables and white wine. The Buff Brahma will get done towards the end of the week.
You will note that I am not going on along the lines of "this is the Country, the noise of Cocks is to be expected". I do actually feel that way but the bottom line is that my neighbour has got worked up enough about this to complain to the council so has probably gone beyond a reduction in noise and is expecting total silence. 30% and I had already decided to slim down the population before the complaint hit the mat so the decision had already been made.
So, no Cocks at the Pile for a while. The hens will sort out a new pecking order and everyone will get a better nights sleep. The Council investigation will come to naught.
..... and next year I can put another batch of eggs through the incubator and start the cycle of life again:-)
One final observation, if this had been France the Town Hall would have laughed at the complaint. Here in the UK we have to be more devious - eat the evidence and start again next year.
30% is generally Office based so still needs to set the alarm which gives me even greater pleasure because I can then ignore the damn thing and doze for 40 minutes or so ...... "What about the chickens?" I hear you ask, "Sod them - they can have a lie in too" is my pithy response. Actually there is further bad news on the chicken front but more of that in a minute.
Going back to 30%, she needs to set the alarm to get ready for the Office but also seems to think that, because I can have a lie in, so can she. She then has to run round like a mad thing shouting in order to get out of the door and leave for work. Why she has to shout I'm not quite sure - it's just one of those things she does.
Right, back to the Poultry If your an urban dweller or of a sensitive nature you might want to go and Google something else because it might get a bit "rocky" from here on in.
First things first, Endemol's death on Saturday was very timely as we have received a notice from the Council about the noise of the Cocks. I don't have a problem with that. The notice is very polite and is just that, it is a notice that they have received a complaint and are obliged to investigate.
We have always been sensitive about the noise of the Cocks and their potential impact on our neighbours and have always made it clear to them that if they are disturbed we will do something about it. That is why I am a little peeved to have had a letter from the Council. Rather than knock on the door and say "Badman - they are getting a bit noisy, can you sort them out" some idiot has got themselves all worked up about the noise and gone to the council rather than just sort it out.
This is where I start my "Towny" rant. I am from a rural background and ringing the council is not the way to do things, just come round and knock on the door and ask! Endemol's death was perfect timing and yesterday saw the Light Sussex have it's neck pulled and it is now sitting in the slow cooker surrounded by vegetables and white wine. The Buff Brahma will get done towards the end of the week.
You will note that I am not going on along the lines of "this is the Country, the noise of Cocks is to be expected". I do actually feel that way but the bottom line is that my neighbour has got worked up enough about this to complain to the council so has probably gone beyond a reduction in noise and is expecting total silence. 30% and I had already decided to slim down the population before the complaint hit the mat so the decision had already been made.
So, no Cocks at the Pile for a while. The hens will sort out a new pecking order and everyone will get a better nights sleep. The Council investigation will come to naught.
..... and next year I can put another batch of eggs through the incubator and start the cycle of life again:-)
One final observation, if this had been France the Town Hall would have laughed at the complaint. Here in the UK we have to be more devious - eat the evidence and start again next year.
Monday, 2 August 2010
Marauder's Bumper Book of Crime - No 2 in an occasional series.
This morning Marauder decided to amuse herself by playing with a heavy duty paper bag of the type that one might use to carry home a nice new shirt from a favourite shop.
Unfortunately the location was the Bedroom and the time was 5 a.m. As is usual for Marauder, the play was ebullient, to say the least.
Unfortunately the location was the Bedroom and the time was 5 a.m. As is usual for Marauder, the play was ebullient, to say the least.
Sunday, 1 August 2010
Domesticity
Today saw us pile in to the car and drop in to a local DIY Warehouse Store to take advantage of a 50% off Sale.
The family bathroom is one room that was vile when we bought the house and has been neglected as the extension gave us a stupendous Jack & Jill Bathroom - an "en-suite" accessible from two Bedrooms.
A few weeks ago I was having my haircut by a the Mum of a friend of TP and was moaning about the fact that the room was only suitable for bathing Tyson & Marauder and that we simply had to do something about it. She mentioned that her Husband had recently set up a Property Services Company and would be more than happy to quote for the job. Now her Hubby is a super chap so we called him and his quote was fantastic. I've seen his work, as he has just finished his wife's new Salon in the Village, so I know his workmanship is fantastic.
So off we went to order the Porcelain Goods, Taps, Shower Mixer and Towel Rail. I had ordered the Shower Tray and Screen earlier in the week from a chap in the Village who is setting up a Kitchen and Bathroom Studio next door to the Hair Salon. Steve, the aforementioned Hairdresser's Husband is doing the fitting out of the Studio which gives me an even greater sense of security about his workmanship and I got a great deal too.
Steve starts the strip out at the beginning of September so we have plenty of time for the fixtures and fittings to arrive. All I need to do now is measure up and get the tiles ordered. We know what we want so I just need to spend 20 minutes with a tape measure and a calculator and I can pop down to the Tile Warehouse to see what deal I can strike on Travertine and White tiles.
The rest of the day saw me upside down on the worktop fitting the low voltage halogens under the kitchen cupboards followed by a wander round the 3 Miler accompanied by 30% and T&M.
TP has finally recovered from his PGL week and it seems that he had a great time and actually met up with a Lad from his school and another Boy who was on an ATE week that TP attended last year. It's a small world!
TP is off to spend a week with his Mum next week so it is a case of revolving doors and 30% has been bogged down with his Laundry from last week and ironing for next week.
On a completely separate subject I have decided to treat myself to a compact digital camera with a decent optical zoom. I have a film and digital SLR but they are bulky to carry especially when I am walking T&M but I regularly see things that merit a snap and would like something small that I can just throw in to my pocket. Who knows, the Journal may get more pictures.
The family bathroom is one room that was vile when we bought the house and has been neglected as the extension gave us a stupendous Jack & Jill Bathroom - an "en-suite" accessible from two Bedrooms.
A few weeks ago I was having my haircut by a the Mum of a friend of TP and was moaning about the fact that the room was only suitable for bathing Tyson & Marauder and that we simply had to do something about it. She mentioned that her Husband had recently set up a Property Services Company and would be more than happy to quote for the job. Now her Hubby is a super chap so we called him and his quote was fantastic. I've seen his work, as he has just finished his wife's new Salon in the Village, so I know his workmanship is fantastic.
So off we went to order the Porcelain Goods, Taps, Shower Mixer and Towel Rail. I had ordered the Shower Tray and Screen earlier in the week from a chap in the Village who is setting up a Kitchen and Bathroom Studio next door to the Hair Salon. Steve, the aforementioned Hairdresser's Husband is doing the fitting out of the Studio which gives me an even greater sense of security about his workmanship and I got a great deal too.
Steve starts the strip out at the beginning of September so we have plenty of time for the fixtures and fittings to arrive. All I need to do now is measure up and get the tiles ordered. We know what we want so I just need to spend 20 minutes with a tape measure and a calculator and I can pop down to the Tile Warehouse to see what deal I can strike on Travertine and White tiles.
The rest of the day saw me upside down on the worktop fitting the low voltage halogens under the kitchen cupboards followed by a wander round the 3 Miler accompanied by 30% and T&M.
TP has finally recovered from his PGL week and it seems that he had a great time and actually met up with a Lad from his school and another Boy who was on an ATE week that TP attended last year. It's a small world!
TP is off to spend a week with his Mum next week so it is a case of revolving doors and 30% has been bogged down with his Laundry from last week and ironing for next week.
On a completely separate subject I have decided to treat myself to a compact digital camera with a decent optical zoom. I have a film and digital SLR but they are bulky to carry especially when I am walking T&M but I regularly see things that merit a snap and would like something small that I can just throw in to my pocket. Who knows, the Journal may get more pictures.
Saturday, 31 July 2010
The King is Dead, Long Live the King.
Endemol
Born: August 2007
Died: 31 July 2010
A bit of a sad day at The Pile.
We returned from collecting TP at the end of his PGL week and returned to find Endemol; our Minorca Cock had died while we were away.
I come from Farming Stock and am not particularly sentimental but am sad to see him go as he was an absolutely stunning bird and a real character to have around. If you are not familiar with Cocks, other than knowing that they crow, they can be a diverse bunch; ranging from evil bastards that fly at you with their spurs at chest height because they see you as a competitor to soppy old things that barely take notice of you.
Endemol was a Gentleman; not aggressive but elegant and refined. We will all miss him.
Back in 2007 we had recently acquired some Minorca Pullets from a fairly local breeder. Village Idiot said that he knew of a Minorca Cock at the other end of the Village and asked if we wanted to borrow him. We agreed and he turned up in a crappy cardboard box tied up with baler twine a few days later. If there is one thing you can say about VI - he has a certain style.
The Cock settled in and started to tread the pullets but we knew that he needed to be with them for at least 10 days for us to stand any chance of having some fertile eggs to incubate. However, after 3 or 4 days we had a Silky Hen go Broody and decided to put a few eggs under her "just in case". 21 days later we heard cheeping so we knew that "Dad" was fertile.
In the mean time we had started to collect eggs to put in to the incubator and so we ended up with 2 batches of chicks; one reared naturally by a broody and the other incubated and reared by us. Time passed and the chicks grew and at about 5 or 6 weeks we were able to work out which were boys and which were girls. Most of the boys were dispatched but we kept the best from each of the hatches and this is how Endemol got his name as he was the "Big Brother".
Endemol's Dad was returned to his owner and we realised that we liked having a Cockerel about and so we kept Endemol and he settled in to his life which basically consisted of food, sex and crowing.
He was so noisy that he couldn't sleep out in the coop at night as he would start up at around three in the morning. So, for fear of complaining neighbours, we used to tuck him up in a box in the cellar overnight and return him to his Hens in the morning. He got so used to this routine that when the hens returned to the coops at night he would wander in to the house as it got dark and would perch on the back of a chair in the hall waiting for one of us to take him down to his box.
Maybe you can see now why we got attached to him. He was a real character.
Incidentally, people will tell you that a cock will not crow if it is dark and also if he cannot stand up and throw his head back to let rip. This is absolute nonsense. Endemol used to crow in a box in a pitch black cellar. His body clock let him know when to start. He didn't need the Sun to tell him it was wakey time.
His finest hour came in the Summer of 2008 when we entered him in the Minorca Class at the Three Counties Agricultural Show. He not only won his breed class but he was also judged to be the best of the Light Breeds and earned a place on the Champions Row.
This means that I can not only claim to have a prize winning cock but can also post a picture of it in the Journal.
Born: August 2007
Died: 31 July 2010
A bit of a sad day at The Pile.
We returned from collecting TP at the end of his PGL week and returned to find Endemol; our Minorca Cock had died while we were away.
I come from Farming Stock and am not particularly sentimental but am sad to see him go as he was an absolutely stunning bird and a real character to have around. If you are not familiar with Cocks, other than knowing that they crow, they can be a diverse bunch; ranging from evil bastards that fly at you with their spurs at chest height because they see you as a competitor to soppy old things that barely take notice of you.
Endemol was a Gentleman; not aggressive but elegant and refined. We will all miss him.
Back in 2007 we had recently acquired some Minorca Pullets from a fairly local breeder. Village Idiot said that he knew of a Minorca Cock at the other end of the Village and asked if we wanted to borrow him. We agreed and he turned up in a crappy cardboard box tied up with baler twine a few days later. If there is one thing you can say about VI - he has a certain style.
The Cock settled in and started to tread the pullets but we knew that he needed to be with them for at least 10 days for us to stand any chance of having some fertile eggs to incubate. However, after 3 or 4 days we had a Silky Hen go Broody and decided to put a few eggs under her "just in case". 21 days later we heard cheeping so we knew that "Dad" was fertile.
In the mean time we had started to collect eggs to put in to the incubator and so we ended up with 2 batches of chicks; one reared naturally by a broody and the other incubated and reared by us. Time passed and the chicks grew and at about 5 or 6 weeks we were able to work out which were boys and which were girls. Most of the boys were dispatched but we kept the best from each of the hatches and this is how Endemol got his name as he was the "Big Brother".
Endemol's Dad was returned to his owner and we realised that we liked having a Cockerel about and so we kept Endemol and he settled in to his life which basically consisted of food, sex and crowing.
He was so noisy that he couldn't sleep out in the coop at night as he would start up at around three in the morning. So, for fear of complaining neighbours, we used to tuck him up in a box in the cellar overnight and return him to his Hens in the morning. He got so used to this routine that when the hens returned to the coops at night he would wander in to the house as it got dark and would perch on the back of a chair in the hall waiting for one of us to take him down to his box.
Maybe you can see now why we got attached to him. He was a real character.
Incidentally, people will tell you that a cock will not crow if it is dark and also if he cannot stand up and throw his head back to let rip. This is absolute nonsense. Endemol used to crow in a box in a pitch black cellar. His body clock let him know when to start. He didn't need the Sun to tell him it was wakey time.
His finest hour came in the Summer of 2008 when we entered him in the Minorca Class at the Three Counties Agricultural Show. He not only won his breed class but he was also judged to be the best of the Light Breeds and earned a place on the Champions Row.
This means that I can not only claim to have a prize winning cock but can also post a picture of it in the Journal.
 |
| Endemol's Finest Hour |
Thursday, 22 July 2010
End of Work Checklist
Out of Office set- CheckVoice mail updated- CheckHair cut- Checke-mail shut down- Check
.... We have a day at the CLA Game Fair tomorrow and then on Saturday we are taking TP off to a PGL Camp up near Grantham for a week. The lucky git is going to spend a week riding motorbikes and driving quads, go-karts and ATVs. No wonder he is known as Spoilt B@stard round here.
When I were a lad ... it was The Double Deckers and an episode of Why Don't You and then they shut the telly down* until Play School at 4 o'clock and that was for little kids. They might, for some unknown reason, put the horse racing on in the afternoon but I would have rather stuck knives in myself than watch that.
Digression over - He is a good kid and he will enjoy the week but he does look at 30% and I in a bemused Stranger in a Foreign Land sort of way when we start mumbling on about only having 3 TV channels and no DVD or Computer or Games Consoles when we were his age.
"What did you do?" he asks and I know I am lucky that when we say we read or made things and went outside he understands because he does those things too and does not start to suffer withdrawal symptoms if he is removed from a room with a 40" Flat Screen in it.
He has had his hair cut short this evening after being just off the top of his collar for the past couple of years. He looks very different and it will take a bit of getting used to. It is also quite ironic as he tried Sea Cadets earlier in the year but didn't really take to it.
One of the differences of opinions was about his hair even though it met their criteria of being above the collar - JUST - he now has the perfect cut from their perspective but has decided to take another tack.
....... and as for the rest of the weekend - I have to re-assemble the Kitchen.
-------------------------------------------
* They didn't but they did tend to show programmes which didn't tend to appeal to a 13 year old. For example; The News and The Open University and I hasten to add that the Testcard does not count as scheduled programming
Wednesday, 21 July 2010
Marauder's Bumper Book of Crime - an occasional series
Today I grabbed my fleece as showers were predicted.
I thrust "poo bags" in one pocket and my phone in the other and then grabbed a handful of dog biscuits as treats for good behaviour. These were placed in the usual pocket and I watched as they trickled out on to the floor.
Somewhat bemused I investigated further ..........
............ That maniac dog had simply chewed through the pocket lining while the fleece was left conveniently on a chair back and had munched the biscuits that had been left there from yesterday.
I thrust "poo bags" in one pocket and my phone in the other and then grabbed a handful of dog biscuits as treats for good behaviour. These were placed in the usual pocket and I watched as they trickled out on to the floor.
Somewhat bemused I investigated further ..........
............ That maniac dog had simply chewed through the pocket lining while the fleece was left conveniently on a chair back and had munched the biscuits that had been left there from yesterday.
Limbo
I am feeling like I am in a strange Limbo Land at the moment.
Dante's have a rule that states that there is a 90 day notice period before I can move from one post to another. I find this peculiar as, if I resigned to take an external post I would only need to serve one month's notice. I can see no reason for this extended period other than it gives the Lesser Demons more time to find another tortured Soul to replace me.
Why Do I feel like I am in Limbo? The work I am currently assigned is unstructured and very messy. There does not appear to be any formal processes or management systems to follow so it is frustrating too. But a good while back I decided to move to another role...
.... now here is an interesting thought - not one of mine, but interesting - You don't decide to seek a new job, You decide to leave your current job. I gave this some thought and it has some merit. If one's job is great it takes an enormous incentive to get an individual to leave and take a new post with all the risks and uncertainties involved. However, if one's current position is not pressing all, or for that matter any, of an individuals buttons they are far more likely to seek new pastures. It is the current job that is making them go not the new one.
I have to admit that I do fall in to this category I enjoy my role but I have been on my current assignment for over 3 years and that is far too long. I am long overdue for a change and hence am moving on. It may well be a Frying Pan / Fire situation but at least all the problems will be ones I havent seen before.
What I am trying to get across is that I am on an assignment that I will not see the end of, I am in the process of handing over my job to my replacement and am only committed to my current assignment for a few weeks more. My work ethic ensures that I will perform my duties to the best of my abilities but this extended notice period and now the hand over means that I am rapidly becoming a spare part.
I have said before that I like to keep busy but I am going to have to take a back seat so that my replacement can take up the reins. I will find a few odds and ends to keep me occupied but I feel that this extended period is not good for me or the role I am filling.
My Associates become frustrated because they know I will not be there to finish the job but the person they need does not get identified for weeks. Also I am forced to perform my job more as a Consultant than at the more detailed level that I usually operate as that would be a virtual impossibility to pass to a colleague.
So the 90 day rule - who does it actually benefit? Option a) me, Option b) the Customer, Option c) My colleagues or Option d) My Manager......
...... answers on a postcard or the back of a sealed envelop to the usual address.
Dante's have a rule that states that there is a 90 day notice period before I can move from one post to another. I find this peculiar as, if I resigned to take an external post I would only need to serve one month's notice. I can see no reason for this extended period other than it gives the Lesser Demons more time to find another tortured Soul to replace me.
Why Do I feel like I am in Limbo? The work I am currently assigned is unstructured and very messy. There does not appear to be any formal processes or management systems to follow so it is frustrating too. But a good while back I decided to move to another role...
.... now here is an interesting thought - not one of mine, but interesting - You don't decide to seek a new job, You decide to leave your current job. I gave this some thought and it has some merit. If one's job is great it takes an enormous incentive to get an individual to leave and take a new post with all the risks and uncertainties involved. However, if one's current position is not pressing all, or for that matter any, of an individuals buttons they are far more likely to seek new pastures. It is the current job that is making them go not the new one.
I have to admit that I do fall in to this category I enjoy my role but I have been on my current assignment for over 3 years and that is far too long. I am long overdue for a change and hence am moving on. It may well be a Frying Pan / Fire situation but at least all the problems will be ones I havent seen before.
What I am trying to get across is that I am on an assignment that I will not see the end of, I am in the process of handing over my job to my replacement and am only committed to my current assignment for a few weeks more. My work ethic ensures that I will perform my duties to the best of my abilities but this extended notice period and now the hand over means that I am rapidly becoming a spare part.
I have said before that I like to keep busy but I am going to have to take a back seat so that my replacement can take up the reins. I will find a few odds and ends to keep me occupied but I feel that this extended period is not good for me or the role I am filling.
My Associates become frustrated because they know I will not be there to finish the job but the person they need does not get identified for weeks. Also I am forced to perform my job more as a Consultant than at the more detailed level that I usually operate as that would be a virtual impossibility to pass to a colleague.
So the 90 day rule - who does it actually benefit? Option a) me, Option b) the Customer, Option c) My colleagues or Option d) My Manager......
...... answers on a postcard or the back of a sealed envelop to the usual address.
Tuesday, 20 July 2010
Nothing to see here!
Tuesday.
Dropped in to the nearest circle of Hell to start passing over my work to the Tortured Soul that will take over from me when I move to another type of torture in a few weeks time.
He has taken over and pushed my rock up the hill on a few previous occasions and I know that he will do a great job. We both tend to push rocks in much the same way so the hand-over should be pretty straightforward.
I had a massive boulder operation going on last year and had to pass it to the same soul as I needed to go and have an Eagle peck at my Heart. When I came back a few weeks later all was well and the rock/hill situation was as Lucifer wanted......
.... a safe pair of hands!
On the Home Front it was dog training this evening and this is a revelation after Puppy Training which was becoming a little "samey". The training exercises are far more advanced and both Tyson & Marauder are really doing well. It is great for TP too as he is in a class with adults and it is a level playing field. He is able to work with Marauder and achieve at the same level as every one else. No "leg ups", no allowances. He is doing really well and it is great for his confidence and maturity. I am really proud of him.
It is a short week this week as I have Friday off. We are planning to spend the day at the CLA Game Fair. I am hoping for good weather and may have to make an offering to the Gods* to ensure Sunny Spells as a minimum rather than the Heavy Rain Showers that are currently forecast.
* Hmmm - all I have a chickens and I think I'd need something approaching Human Sacrifice to get that degree of change in the weather. Ah well - better take a coat and wellington boots.
Dropped in to the nearest circle of Hell to start passing over my work to the Tortured Soul that will take over from me when I move to another type of torture in a few weeks time.
He has taken over and pushed my rock up the hill on a few previous occasions and I know that he will do a great job. We both tend to push rocks in much the same way so the hand-over should be pretty straightforward.
I had a massive boulder operation going on last year and had to pass it to the same soul as I needed to go and have an Eagle peck at my Heart. When I came back a few weeks later all was well and the rock/hill situation was as Lucifer wanted......
.... a safe pair of hands!
On the Home Front it was dog training this evening and this is a revelation after Puppy Training which was becoming a little "samey". The training exercises are far more advanced and both Tyson & Marauder are really doing well. It is great for TP too as he is in a class with adults and it is a level playing field. He is able to work with Marauder and achieve at the same level as every one else. No "leg ups", no allowances. He is doing really well and it is great for his confidence and maturity. I am really proud of him.
It is a short week this week as I have Friday off. We are planning to spend the day at the CLA Game Fair. I am hoping for good weather and may have to make an offering to the Gods* to ensure Sunny Spells as a minimum rather than the Heavy Rain Showers that are currently forecast.
* Hmmm - all I have a chickens and I think I'd need something approaching Human Sacrifice to get that degree of change in the weather. Ah well - better take a coat and wellington boots.
Sunday, 18 July 2010
All I have to do now....
..... is put it all back together.
30% and I have finally finished painting the kitchen. We started it weeks ago and should be proudly showing off our efforts by now but a few things came up. There were occasions when simply doing nothing seemed a much better idea than applying emulsion to the walls. Anyway, we applied the last coats t the walls today and this is when I found out that I am probably no more intelligent than a pigeon...
.... let me explain. We have a tall larder fridge and we moved it in to sit along side the island so that we could paint the walls and skirting boards of the aforementioned appliance's aperture. As I have already explained it then lived in this temporary location for a few weeks but it now back in its proper place. The thing is, every time I make 30% a cup of coffee I go to get the milk from where the fridge was rather than where the fridge is.
In other words I have managed to condition myself to go to a location where I expect to received milk in much the same way as a pigeon will peck at a coloured spot in order to receive a few grains of corn. I hasten to add that I have managed to break this conditioning in under 24 hours but it was quite an odd experience to find oneself walking towards a space expecting to grab a carton of semi-skimmed.
Other decorating events. For brief spell Marauder - it is always Marauder - had a few patches of "Putting Green" on her. That's the feature wall, the rest of the room is Ivory Lace. I didn't want an "accent" Dog so then spent a good few minutes cleaning off the paint. I then discovered that using the dish cloth did not earn 30%'s full approval.
This reminded me of a Fly/Drive holiday we had in the States three years ago. No, not the moaning about using the dish cloth to clean the dog, the fact that the dog was briefly green in places.
As part of our Road Trip we visited Monument valley which is in the Navajo Nation. If you have never been there it's worth a trip but the Navajo Nation has its own ground rules which mean that it is unlike the rest of the USA.
For starters there is no alcohol allowed. Apparently this is an attempt to control the alcoholism that is prevalent in the population. I have a couple of thoughts on this...
... thought number 1; that law is great and will stop people who can't drive and don't have any friends that can drive from drinking. Everyone else will just get in their car and buy it just outside the border. Thought number 2; the Nation ought to concentrate on making the Nation a little more hospitable and encouraging to visitors as they seem to have two potential industries farming and tourism and they don't seem very good at either. It is no wonder that the locals tend to drink.
The end result is that we spend a night in a Trailer Park in a static van that smelt of Horse Piss.
The Valley is a fantastic natural spectacle and worth a visit - just don't try to spend a night in the vicinity until the Navajo Nation get their act together.
What about the dog and the paint - Yes. I'm getting to that. To give you some idea of what it is like in the Nation, they paint a broad, coloured stripe of gloss paint down their dog's back to show that it isn't a stray. Hence the dogs at the Horse Piss Trailer Park were a a shade of aquamarine that matched the caravans. They smelt pretty similar too. The reason for this........
........ apparently a local hobby is shooting strays so painting your dog reduces the chance of it ending up as target practice for the bored and drunk locals.
Only in America.
30% and I have finally finished painting the kitchen. We started it weeks ago and should be proudly showing off our efforts by now but a few things came up. There were occasions when simply doing nothing seemed a much better idea than applying emulsion to the walls. Anyway, we applied the last coats t the walls today and this is when I found out that I am probably no more intelligent than a pigeon...
.... let me explain. We have a tall larder fridge and we moved it in to sit along side the island so that we could paint the walls and skirting boards of the aforementioned appliance's aperture. As I have already explained it then lived in this temporary location for a few weeks but it now back in its proper place. The thing is, every time I make 30% a cup of coffee I go to get the milk from where the fridge was rather than where the fridge is.
In other words I have managed to condition myself to go to a location where I expect to received milk in much the same way as a pigeon will peck at a coloured spot in order to receive a few grains of corn. I hasten to add that I have managed to break this conditioning in under 24 hours but it was quite an odd experience to find oneself walking towards a space expecting to grab a carton of semi-skimmed.
Other decorating events. For brief spell Marauder - it is always Marauder - had a few patches of "Putting Green" on her. That's the feature wall, the rest of the room is Ivory Lace. I didn't want an "accent" Dog so then spent a good few minutes cleaning off the paint. I then discovered that using the dish cloth did not earn 30%'s full approval.
This reminded me of a Fly/Drive holiday we had in the States three years ago. No, not the moaning about using the dish cloth to clean the dog, the fact that the dog was briefly green in places.
As part of our Road Trip we visited Monument valley which is in the Navajo Nation. If you have never been there it's worth a trip but the Navajo Nation has its own ground rules which mean that it is unlike the rest of the USA.
For starters there is no alcohol allowed. Apparently this is an attempt to control the alcoholism that is prevalent in the population. I have a couple of thoughts on this...
... thought number 1; that law is great and will stop people who can't drive and don't have any friends that can drive from drinking. Everyone else will just get in their car and buy it just outside the border. Thought number 2; the Nation ought to concentrate on making the Nation a little more hospitable and encouraging to visitors as they seem to have two potential industries farming and tourism and they don't seem very good at either. It is no wonder that the locals tend to drink.
The end result is that we spend a night in a Trailer Park in a static van that smelt of Horse Piss.
The Valley is a fantastic natural spectacle and worth a visit - just don't try to spend a night in the vicinity until the Navajo Nation get their act together.
What about the dog and the paint - Yes. I'm getting to that. To give you some idea of what it is like in the Nation, they paint a broad, coloured stripe of gloss paint down their dog's back to show that it isn't a stray. Hence the dogs at the Horse Piss Trailer Park were a a shade of aquamarine that matched the caravans. They smelt pretty similar too. The reason for this........
........ apparently a local hobby is shooting strays so painting your dog reduces the chance of it ending up as target practice for the bored and drunk locals.
Only in America.
Friday, 16 July 2010
I've just got my life back
Its Friday and the weekend has started.
I have had an odd week. For the past few days I feel that I have been a complete arse hole and have repeated pointed out deficiencies in an attempt to get matters on to a sound footing. Let me explain.....
Dante's Nine Circles of Hell is a very sound analogy for my Employer. We have the normal stuff that we do day in, day out like having tortured souls push rocks to the tops of hills. The rocks then roll back down and are pushed back up ad infinitum. Occasionally one of these rocks rolls in to a pool of molten brimstone and we have to engage other Souls and possible Imps to sort this out but this is all pretty much Business as Usual.
But Lucifer has a plan for Universal Domination and that means tempting new Souls to come to Dante's Circles of Hell. We have a set of 7 Service Lines to do this. You must have heard of them; Gluttony, Greed. Envy, Pride, Lust etc. and we use these to bring in new souls to torture.
Now you must understand that there are other Forces out there that will try to protect these Souls and divert them from Lucifer's path or at least ensure that they give Lucifer a good talking to. These other Forces fall in to a number of categories including Competitors and Lawyers.
As a consequence of this we have a number of Business Processes that we need to follow to ensure that we are torturing souls in the right way and have all the necessary paperwork assigning their Souls over to Dante's - signed in blood, Obviously - before we get them up to necks in Brimstone or chained to rocks whilst a large Eagle pecks at their heart on a daily basis.
Yes - I'm getting to the point - These processes are there for a good reason and have been designed by people far more experienced than I am. they are bulky and they are arduous but they are there for a reason and ensure that once we have a Soul chained to a rock they better have a bloody good reason for asking for Sunday off to go and see their Mum.
I have had to be an arse hole because I have been repeatedly pointing out that these processes need to be engaged to absolutely no avail. I might as well have tried to fly by flapping my arms - and as you know I don't have the right Employer - you have to work for one of the other Guys if you want to have flying perks.
Yes - I was getting nowhere and then I started to point out what a lot of stupid questions they were asking and copied the Imp's Skidmarks manager in on a couple of mails and suddenly things start to happen.
This tells me three things;
I have had an odd week. For the past few days I feel that I have been a complete arse hole and have repeated pointed out deficiencies in an attempt to get matters on to a sound footing. Let me explain.....
Dante's Nine Circles of Hell is a very sound analogy for my Employer. We have the normal stuff that we do day in, day out like having tortured souls push rocks to the tops of hills. The rocks then roll back down and are pushed back up ad infinitum. Occasionally one of these rocks rolls in to a pool of molten brimstone and we have to engage other Souls and possible Imps to sort this out but this is all pretty much Business as Usual.
But Lucifer has a plan for Universal Domination and that means tempting new Souls to come to Dante's Circles of Hell. We have a set of 7 Service Lines to do this. You must have heard of them; Gluttony, Greed. Envy, Pride, Lust etc. and we use these to bring in new souls to torture.
Now you must understand that there are other Forces out there that will try to protect these Souls and divert them from Lucifer's path or at least ensure that they give Lucifer a good talking to. These other Forces fall in to a number of categories including Competitors and Lawyers.
As a consequence of this we have a number of Business Processes that we need to follow to ensure that we are torturing souls in the right way and have all the necessary paperwork assigning their Souls over to Dante's - signed in blood, Obviously - before we get them up to necks in Brimstone or chained to rocks whilst a large Eagle pecks at their heart on a daily basis.
Yes - I'm getting to the point - These processes are there for a good reason and have been designed by people far more experienced than I am. they are bulky and they are arduous but they are there for a reason and ensure that once we have a Soul chained to a rock they better have a bloody good reason for asking for Sunday off to go and see their Mum.
I have had to be an arse hole because I have been repeatedly pointing out that these processes need to be engaged to absolutely no avail. I might as well have tried to fly by flapping my arms - and as you know I don't have the right Employer - you have to work for one of the other Guys if you want to have flying perks.
Yes - I was getting nowhere and then I started to point out what a lot of stupid questions they were asking and copied the Imp's Skidmarks manager in on a couple of mails and suddenly things start to happen.
This tells me three things;
- I was probably right to press for these things to be done
- The Skid Mark was probably not right to have ignored me
- Escalation can be an effective tool
Thursday, 15 July 2010
Escape Committee
Day # 263 - The Escape Committee met in Hut C. Golfy, Stretch and myself were joined by a new chap called The Doctor. Stretch & Golfy say he's a Decent Sort but he seems a little too friendly with one of the Camp Commandants for my liking. He may just be keeping tabs but I'm going to be cautious until I know him better.
We discussed progress on "Tom, Dick & Harry" and it seems like Tom is progressing better than the other two escape routes at present. I am certain that it is on target to surface deep in the trees and I plan to make my escape on the evening of 5th August when it is a new moon.
I obviously need a Dummy to put in my bunk in case the Night Guards sweep the hut with their torches and I hope to have news on the Dummy in the next day or so. Golfy & Stretch are concerned that I will get caught but I'm prepared and there is no way they are going to catch me off guard with "Good Luck". I know that the correct response is a puzzled look and "Danke" in my best Bavarian accent.
I had hoped to keep my escape Top Secret but it seems that Stretch lost his nerve under questioning and may have let something slip to one of the sub-lieutenants . Everything seems fine but I need to keep my ears open for any unexpected changes in Guard rotas.
Golfy is having problems with his Dick ....
..... having hit a strata of shale. He either needs to take apart more of the bunks to shore up the length he has managed or give up and look for another way out of the camp. Personally I think the Glider has much style about it but is not the most practical option. Disguising himself as a Trooper and joining the back of the squad as they exit the main gate is much more likely to get him to the Swiss Border.
As for Stretch he has had no luck with Harry and may be here until the Conflict is over. He says he can see but his failing eyesight is common knowledge and I plan to run fast and can't carry him with me. He is a Good Egg and I know that he can be trusted to keep on making escape attempts. He know that this is his duty as an Englishman's and an Officer. He is so Brave.
He should look on the bright side though - he will get to open all of the Red Cross Parcels with me and Golfy gone. I gave him a parcel today that should make his supper much nicer than the gruel we have been getting these past 8 months.
I have to go now as they Guard is coming round - "quick, tuck this under the stove"
We discussed progress on "Tom, Dick & Harry" and it seems like Tom is progressing better than the other two escape routes at present. I am certain that it is on target to surface deep in the trees and I plan to make my escape on the evening of 5th August when it is a new moon.
I obviously need a Dummy to put in my bunk in case the Night Guards sweep the hut with their torches and I hope to have news on the Dummy in the next day or so. Golfy & Stretch are concerned that I will get caught but I'm prepared and there is no way they are going to catch me off guard with "Good Luck". I know that the correct response is a puzzled look and "Danke" in my best Bavarian accent.
I had hoped to keep my escape Top Secret but it seems that Stretch lost his nerve under questioning and may have let something slip to one of the sub-lieutenants . Everything seems fine but I need to keep my ears open for any unexpected changes in Guard rotas.
Golfy is having problems with his Dick ....
..... having hit a strata of shale. He either needs to take apart more of the bunks to shore up the length he has managed or give up and look for another way out of the camp. Personally I think the Glider has much style about it but is not the most practical option. Disguising himself as a Trooper and joining the back of the squad as they exit the main gate is much more likely to get him to the Swiss Border.
As for Stretch he has had no luck with Harry and may be here until the Conflict is over. He says he can see but his failing eyesight is common knowledge and I plan to run fast and can't carry him with me. He is a Good Egg and I know that he can be trusted to keep on making escape attempts. He know that this is his duty as an Englishman's and an Officer. He is so Brave.
He should look on the bright side though - he will get to open all of the Red Cross Parcels with me and Golfy gone. I gave him a parcel today that should make his supper much nicer than the gruel we have been getting these past 8 months.
I have to go now as they Guard is coming round - "quick, tuck this under the stove"
Wednesday, 14 July 2010
Heart Rate
Following on from yesterday's post I carried out a few basic calculations.
The average heart rate for a Human Being is 72 beats per minute. After a few divisions this can be seen to equate to about 39.6 years.
Apparently our ability to manipulate our environment and provide medical care gives us an extra 1 million heart beats or 26.4 years. That is quite an impressive improvement but surprisingly still not that far off the Biblical "3 score years and 10".
Using this basic information it would be wise to keep people you dislike as stressed a possible, thereby getting them to hit the magic 2.5B as early as possible.
It is with great disappointment that I learn that even if I can push the heart rate to an average of 100 bpm the Imp's Skid-mark is still going to be around for another 19.025 years. CURSES!
Saner stuff - it was the first Dog Training Class since Tyson has finished her Season. We have also now been promoted out of the Puppy Class since T&M achieved their Bronze KC Award. They both did really well and are definitely not the worst dogs in the new class and it is surprising how their behavior changes when they are in a class of older dogs.
Whilst in an educational vein it was also TP's Parents Evening and all was well. Anyone who knows TP will be relieved to hear that the XBox Controls and i Pod Touch privileges have been reinstated.
The average heart rate for a Human Being is 72 beats per minute. After a few divisions this can be seen to equate to about 39.6 years.
Apparently our ability to manipulate our environment and provide medical care gives us an extra 1 million heart beats or 26.4 years. That is quite an impressive improvement but surprisingly still not that far off the Biblical "3 score years and 10".
Using this basic information it would be wise to keep people you dislike as stressed a possible, thereby getting them to hit the magic 2.5B as early as possible.
It is with great disappointment that I learn that even if I can push the heart rate to an average of 100 bpm the Imp's Skid-mark is still going to be around for another 19.025 years. CURSES!
Saner stuff - it was the first Dog Training Class since Tyson has finished her Season. We have also now been promoted out of the Puppy Class since T&M achieved their Bronze KC Award. They both did really well and are definitely not the worst dogs in the new class and it is surprising how their behavior changes when they are in a class of older dogs.
Whilst in an educational vein it was also TP's Parents Evening and all was well. Anyone who knows TP will be relieved to hear that the XBox Controls and i Pod Touch privileges have been reinstated.
Tuesday, 13 July 2010
A change in the weather.
My mood matches the weather today - overcast, grey clouds, a little sullen perhaps.
A few entries back I boldly stated, or should that be "stated boldly" ? - that I wouldn't be mentioning work as it was hard to make it interesting to a reader with no actual investment in the Organisation. You didn't beleve me did you?
Well the Imp's Skidmark has been on form today. I had three emails from him. Every one of them, and I am not exaggerating, had been answered, prior to their issue by me over the past few days. He was, of course, on the distribution lists of these mails. I tried talking to his Senior PM but "birds of a feather...."
In the end I decided to reply to each of his mails embedding a pdf of the earlier mail where I had answered the questions he was now asking. I had responded to all three by 9.30 this morning.
Funnily enough I have had quite a quiet day today.
Other stuff: It is Step Mum's birthday today she will be 412 in cat years. I don't think I ever properly grasped that one. "How old us your dog?" "He is 9, which is 63 in dog years". No its not. It is 9 years. Your dog is not on a planet that is rotating round the sun 7 times faster than the one I am on, and the last time I looked the definition of a year was in the region of 365 days or the period of time it takes the Earth to complete a full orbit of the Sun.
What is happening here is that they are trying to equate the age of a dog with the age of a human so you can work out when it is likely to go and scorch patches on the Elysian Fields.
This is where it gets interesting - vaguely - not really interesting. For most mammals their lifespan is approximately 1.5 Billion Heart beats. The reason that mammals have different lifespans when measured in years is all down to body size. The smaller the animal the faster the heart beats and hence the shorter its life when measured as a unit of time.
The only exception to this is Human Beings as medical advances have allowed us to live longer than our body size would suggest. So, going full circle - comparing a dog's life span to a humans is a bit odd.
A few entries back I boldly stated, or should that be "stated boldly" ? - that I wouldn't be mentioning work as it was hard to make it interesting to a reader with no actual investment in the Organisation. You didn't beleve me did you?
Well the Imp's Skidmark has been on form today. I had three emails from him. Every one of them, and I am not exaggerating, had been answered, prior to their issue by me over the past few days. He was, of course, on the distribution lists of these mails. I tried talking to his Senior PM but "birds of a feather...."
In the end I decided to reply to each of his mails embedding a pdf of the earlier mail where I had answered the questions he was now asking. I had responded to all three by 9.30 this morning.
Funnily enough I have had quite a quiet day today.
Other stuff: It is Step Mum's birthday today she will be 412 in cat years. I don't think I ever properly grasped that one. "How old us your dog?" "He is 9, which is 63 in dog years". No its not. It is 9 years. Your dog is not on a planet that is rotating round the sun 7 times faster than the one I am on, and the last time I looked the definition of a year was in the region of 365 days or the period of time it takes the Earth to complete a full orbit of the Sun.
What is happening here is that they are trying to equate the age of a dog with the age of a human so you can work out when it is likely to go and scorch patches on the Elysian Fields.
This is where it gets interesting - vaguely - not really interesting. For most mammals their lifespan is approximately 1.5 Billion Heart beats. The reason that mammals have different lifespans when measured in years is all down to body size. The smaller the animal the faster the heart beats and hence the shorter its life when measured as a unit of time.
The only exception to this is Human Beings as medical advances have allowed us to live longer than our body size would suggest. So, going full circle - comparing a dog's life span to a humans is a bit odd.
Monday, 12 July 2010
Success at last.
I forgot to mention that it was the Village Horse Show on Saturday. I had absolutely no intention of going as I am not a great fan of the horse. That has a lot to do with a pushy, horsey Mother but I'm not going to go in to that now. I just need to state that I can ride, but don't.
I have a great respect for working horses but I just cannot see the point of hacking..... and how bloody miserable do they look as you crawl past at 4 miles per hour. Why do something if it makes you that unhappy? I'm not sure if it is a regional thing but the women and girls (never, actually very rarely, men) who hack around here look as miserable as sin.
Anyway, another digression, I had no intention of going but I was walking Tyson & Marauder on Friday evening and we happened across a Gentleman with two aged Collies. He asked if we were planning to enter them in the Dog Show that was in the Schedule of the aforementioned Horsey Extravaganza - thus the seed was sown.
I mentioned it to 30% and she thought it was a marvelous idea and I could see that it was going to get me out of at least 2 hours of emulsioning so obviously I was all for it.
The weather was splendid and the afternoon could only have been better if there had been a beer tent. Marauder came third in the Puppy class and Tyson stormed through to win the Dog in best condition. How she managed to not get a place in the Puppy class but win another class hands down does question the Judges objective set of criteria but I'm not going to dwell.
We drove home - too damned hot to walk and bathed in T&M's reflected Glory. 30% was considering making an official complaint as the dog that won best in show was from Stourport which is over 20 miles away and therefore not local - "Leave it 30, they're not worth it"......
.... plus they are going to regret getting a St Bernard when they realise it is basically a drool machine. I hate slobbery dogs - Sell-by-date take note!
I have a great respect for working horses but I just cannot see the point of hacking..... and how bloody miserable do they look as you crawl past at 4 miles per hour. Why do something if it makes you that unhappy? I'm not sure if it is a regional thing but the women and girls (never, actually very rarely, men) who hack around here look as miserable as sin.
Anyway, another digression, I had no intention of going but I was walking Tyson & Marauder on Friday evening and we happened across a Gentleman with two aged Collies. He asked if we were planning to enter them in the Dog Show that was in the Schedule of the aforementioned Horsey Extravaganza - thus the seed was sown.
I mentioned it to 30% and she thought it was a marvelous idea and I could see that it was going to get me out of at least 2 hours of emulsioning so obviously I was all for it.
The weather was splendid and the afternoon could only have been better if there had been a beer tent. Marauder came third in the Puppy class and Tyson stormed through to win the Dog in best condition. How she managed to not get a place in the Puppy class but win another class hands down does question the Judges objective set of criteria but I'm not going to dwell.
We drove home - too damned hot to walk and bathed in T&M's reflected Glory. 30% was considering making an official complaint as the dog that won best in show was from Stourport which is over 20 miles away and therefore not local - "Leave it 30, they're not worth it"......
.... plus they are going to regret getting a St Bernard when they realise it is basically a drool machine. I hate slobbery dogs - Sell-by-date take note!
Sunday, 11 July 2010
Where are they now?
Today, for some reason, I found myself with an urgent desire to track down the Mice from the Marvellous Mechanical Mouse Organ that used to appear on 1970s Children's TV Series Bagpuss.
Now I bet you are all thinking Bagpuss; Saggy, cloth cat, baggy and a bit loose at the seams - Yeah Right! That is all "front". He was an evil manipulator that made Jabba the Hutt look like a thoroughly decent fellow - that stuff with Han Solo and the carbonite was all a misunderstanding that was sorted out over a few drinks a long time ago ....... in a Galaxy far, far away.
Sorry, bit of a digression, back to Bagpuss - That shop was a front for all sorts of criminal activity including drugs and prostitution, Why do you think that you never saw much of Emily in any of the episodes? She was too busy upstairs "earning" to pay for Bagpuss's opium habit.
If you look closely at the character you can see that they are all nefarious individuals; Madeleine - Brothel Madame, Gabriel - a Drunk Musician and Professor Yaffle - a Gay Intellectual that amuses Bagpuss or Don Bagpuss as he is better known.....
..... and now to the Mice, that evil cloth cat had them hooked on drugs and enslaved them to work for him in that sham shop; fixing thing and putting them in the window for their owners to find and collect. What sort of Business Model is that? How can you run an Organisation with approximately 10 employees, that we know off, with no apparent income. It just doesn't add up. That cat was up to something - something VERY BAD.
Well I can report that every dog has his day and that dog was Shep. With little to do when not on the Blue Peter set he used to Moonlight as a Sniffer Dog for "The Met" and Don Bagpuss was one of his first major Busts. The Don was put away for a long time. Personally I think that he should have gone to "the Chair" but they could never get anyone to testify to the allegations about the Clangers "sleeping with the fishes".
Madeleine did a 10 year stretch in Holloway which was reduced to 3 after she spilled the Beans about Magpie hostess Jennie Hanley.
Yes, the Mice, they did OK - after rehab they took to the High Seas and became Pirates. They fashioned a Long ship from a Nike Training Shoe using the lace holes for the oars and can be seen locally when the stream is high singing in their high pitched voices......
"we will rape and we will pillage,
we will burn your bloody village ...."
I love a happy ending.
Now I bet you are all thinking Bagpuss; Saggy, cloth cat, baggy and a bit loose at the seams - Yeah Right! That is all "front". He was an evil manipulator that made Jabba the Hutt look like a thoroughly decent fellow - that stuff with Han Solo and the carbonite was all a misunderstanding that was sorted out over a few drinks a long time ago ....... in a Galaxy far, far away.
Sorry, bit of a digression, back to Bagpuss - That shop was a front for all sorts of criminal activity including drugs and prostitution, Why do you think that you never saw much of Emily in any of the episodes? She was too busy upstairs "earning" to pay for Bagpuss's opium habit.
If you look closely at the character you can see that they are all nefarious individuals; Madeleine - Brothel Madame, Gabriel - a Drunk Musician and Professor Yaffle - a Gay Intellectual that amuses Bagpuss or Don Bagpuss as he is better known.....
..... and now to the Mice, that evil cloth cat had them hooked on drugs and enslaved them to work for him in that sham shop; fixing thing and putting them in the window for their owners to find and collect. What sort of Business Model is that? How can you run an Organisation with approximately 10 employees, that we know off, with no apparent income. It just doesn't add up. That cat was up to something - something VERY BAD.
Well I can report that every dog has his day and that dog was Shep. With little to do when not on the Blue Peter set he used to Moonlight as a Sniffer Dog for "The Met" and Don Bagpuss was one of his first major Busts. The Don was put away for a long time. Personally I think that he should have gone to "the Chair" but they could never get anyone to testify to the allegations about the Clangers "sleeping with the fishes".
Madeleine did a 10 year stretch in Holloway which was reduced to 3 after she spilled the Beans about Magpie hostess Jennie Hanley.
Yes, the Mice, they did OK - after rehab they took to the High Seas and became Pirates. They fashioned a Long ship from a Nike Training Shoe using the lace holes for the oars and can be seen locally when the stream is high singing in their high pitched voices......
"we will rape and we will pillage,
we will burn your bloody village ...."
I love a happy ending.
Saturday, 10 July 2010
Thumbs Up
I forgot to mention that the Customer Services Team at Dualit deserve a vote of gratitude as the Bean Hopper for the coffee grinder has turned up.
I can now remove the large bandage holding a soggy wodge of coffee grinds against my skin. I was hoping it would work in a similar way to an HRT Patch.
I have had positive experiences with this Company before. Six months ago our Toaster failed. It was about 20 months old and outside the warranty period. I called Dualit to see whether it could be repaired and the Lady at the end of the line simply asked what colour it was and where I lived. She then promptly sent out another unit.
I was amazed and it is a classic example of how much higher we rate a company when we see how well it responds to a problem. Apparently we will rate such an organisation higher than one that gives consistently good service. I have a 40 year old Kenwood Blender that is fantastic. It never misses a beat and I really rate them but Dualit sits higher in my Consumer Consciousness because of their Customer Service.
Incidentally, 30% smashed the Liquidiser on the Kenwood - she breaks all of my Kitchen toys :-(
I can now remove the large bandage holding a soggy wodge of coffee grinds against my skin. I was hoping it would work in a similar way to an HRT Patch.
I have had positive experiences with this Company before. Six months ago our Toaster failed. It was about 20 months old and outside the warranty period. I called Dualit to see whether it could be repaired and the Lady at the end of the line simply asked what colour it was and where I lived. She then promptly sent out another unit.
I was amazed and it is a classic example of how much higher we rate a company when we see how well it responds to a problem. Apparently we will rate such an organisation higher than one that gives consistently good service. I have a 40 year old Kenwood Blender that is fantastic. It never misses a beat and I really rate them but Dualit sits higher in my Consumer Consciousness because of their Customer Service.
Incidentally, 30% smashed the Liquidiser on the Kenwood - she breaks all of my Kitchen toys :-(
Friday, 9 July 2010
All Sorts
Well Yesterday was somewhat monopolised by a lesser Demon from Dante's Inferno. No, he is not even worth the title Demon, Imp's skid mark is probably more appropriate. I spent the day being told stuff that I had told him and his two predecessors, and their Managers, weeks if not months before.
They have finally got the message. I don't understand why it takes so long. I'm mean I am not allowed to punch them in the head and recite the problem with each syllable being timed to a punch. Apparently we have a code of conduct which prevent this educational approach. I am therefore left to produce PowerPoint Presentations, E-mails and documents to describe the issue.
Now I'm not in the same galaxy as professional writers but I can string a few paragraphs together and one of my readers was complimentary about a succinct analysis I recently made in the Journal so I do not understand why it takes months for a real problem to be recognised.
Actually I do. I have had the pleasure to work with some really good Project Managers in my time all very different but all very good. This is not one of those occasions.
So, Yesterday, a 13 hour working day including an hour spent on the M25 travelling 11 miles. Most of the hour was actually spent travelling the first 7 of these. How do you think I handled that? ....
... actually it was OK. The Prius is nice and high and allows me to peer in to peoples cars and I just munched a load of chocolate and crisps and watched the world crawl while I listened to Radio 4.
The only thing that jars is that, by the time you get home and eat, there is very little of the day left for me. I don't count 6 hours in the car as "me time".
Also no Red Kites.
Today, I have found my Mojo and have had a good day pinning things down and getting them passed to the people who need to know, reviewing materials and pointing out how it can be improved. Real work and I feel that I have actually made a difference as compared to yesterday where I am banging my head against an immovable object - My PMs Evolutionary quotient.
You might ask what an Evolutionary Quotient is. I have just invented it. It is a number that indicates how far up the evolutionary tree one is. All species should have an EQ value of 100 i.e. 100 represents that you are 100 percent human or 100% E. coli. My PM is about 42. In other words Eddy could probably do a better job.
You are probably guessing that I'm not too enamuored with him - and you would be right
Back to today - I got loads done and had an enjoyable lunch with Dad - he brought home made Tomato soup over and we had a lovely time chatting and keeping up with each others news. He is really excited about his forthcoming birthday present. He doesn't say but I know he is. It will only be three or four weeks more before his puppy arrives and you can see from the way he interacts with Tyson and Marauder how keen he is to have a dog back in his life.
We talked about when I was a child and the Dogs he had then and before; Peggy the ratter and Lassie, Lulu and Fly the three working Border Collie Bitches that my Grandfather had when I was young. Apparently Fly was the best of these and cost £40 back in the early 1960s. That was a lot of money for a dog in those days but she was trained by a local Stock-man and apparently was unbelievable with Cattle and Sheep.
We also pinned down a saying that I recalled from my childhood but wasn't too clear on the details. I have a memory of my Grandfather saying that if you were looking to buy a piece of land you should first tie a donkey to the biggest thistle in the field.
What? I can almost hear you. Basically thistles are deep rooted and like good soil. If the soil is poor or there is bed rock just beneath the surface the thistles will not be good specimens and the Donkey will be left without a tether.
So that is just about it. TP had a successful Sports Day yesterday with two firsts in the 100m and Hurdles and a third in the 800m. I am obviously very proud as I am with the recent School Report which was so good that he actually got the XBox controls returned and I think that the IPod Touch privileges will be reinstated shortly too.
They have finally got the message. I don't understand why it takes so long. I'm mean I am not allowed to punch them in the head and recite the problem with each syllable being timed to a punch. Apparently we have a code of conduct which prevent this educational approach. I am therefore left to produce PowerPoint Presentations, E-mails and documents to describe the issue.
Now I'm not in the same galaxy as professional writers but I can string a few paragraphs together and one of my readers was complimentary about a succinct analysis I recently made in the Journal so I do not understand why it takes months for a real problem to be recognised.
Actually I do. I have had the pleasure to work with some really good Project Managers in my time all very different but all very good. This is not one of those occasions.
So, Yesterday, a 13 hour working day including an hour spent on the M25 travelling 11 miles. Most of the hour was actually spent travelling the first 7 of these. How do you think I handled that? ....
... actually it was OK. The Prius is nice and high and allows me to peer in to peoples cars and I just munched a load of chocolate and crisps and watched the world crawl while I listened to Radio 4.
The only thing that jars is that, by the time you get home and eat, there is very little of the day left for me. I don't count 6 hours in the car as "me time".
Also no Red Kites.
Today, I have found my Mojo and have had a good day pinning things down and getting them passed to the people who need to know, reviewing materials and pointing out how it can be improved. Real work and I feel that I have actually made a difference as compared to yesterday where I am banging my head against an immovable object - My PMs Evolutionary quotient.
You might ask what an Evolutionary Quotient is. I have just invented it. It is a number that indicates how far up the evolutionary tree one is. All species should have an EQ value of 100 i.e. 100 represents that you are 100 percent human or 100% E. coli. My PM is about 42. In other words Eddy could probably do a better job.
You are probably guessing that I'm not too enamuored with him - and you would be right
Back to today - I got loads done and had an enjoyable lunch with Dad - he brought home made Tomato soup over and we had a lovely time chatting and keeping up with each others news. He is really excited about his forthcoming birthday present. He doesn't say but I know he is. It will only be three or four weeks more before his puppy arrives and you can see from the way he interacts with Tyson and Marauder how keen he is to have a dog back in his life.
We talked about when I was a child and the Dogs he had then and before; Peggy the ratter and Lassie, Lulu and Fly the three working Border Collie Bitches that my Grandfather had when I was young. Apparently Fly was the best of these and cost £40 back in the early 1960s. That was a lot of money for a dog in those days but she was trained by a local Stock-man and apparently was unbelievable with Cattle and Sheep.
We also pinned down a saying that I recalled from my childhood but wasn't too clear on the details. I have a memory of my Grandfather saying that if you were looking to buy a piece of land you should first tie a donkey to the biggest thistle in the field.
What? I can almost hear you. Basically thistles are deep rooted and like good soil. If the soil is poor or there is bed rock just beneath the surface the thistles will not be good specimens and the Donkey will be left without a tether.
So that is just about it. TP had a successful Sports Day yesterday with two firsts in the 100m and Hurdles and a third in the 800m. I am obviously very proud as I am with the recent School Report which was so good that he actually got the XBox controls returned and I think that the IPod Touch privileges will be reinstated shortly too.
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